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Summer_Twilight
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23 Jul 2016, 4:52 pm

I was wanting to know what the social unwritten rules were of going to a movie theater by myself? Is it normally inappropriate to talk to strangers after movie that you're passionate about?



kraftiekortie
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24 Jul 2016, 6:10 am

In general, it's taboo to talk about the movie to anybody while the movie is being played.

I don't think a man would mind it if a lone woman came up to him and started talking about the movie, if the movie is not actually being shown.

Some women might mind; others wouldn't mind.

Of course, there will be people who will be dicks and c***s about it.....just ignore those people.

I would guess, in general, that most people go to movies in groups, and that they want to hang out with each other within the group, rather than with somebody out of the group. There are exceptions, though.

As a default, I'd probably not talk to anybody while I'm at the movie.

While the movie is actually playing, it would be taboo to talk to somebody



Summer_Twilight
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24 Jul 2016, 9:50 am

Is it a taboo to talk to anyone about the movie after it's over when people are walking out?



kraftiekortie
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24 Jul 2016, 2:05 pm

Not taboo....but probably inappropriate. People usually want to get to the bathroom following the end of the movie.

I would wait for someone to talk to you.



Earthbound
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25 Jul 2016, 11:12 pm

I think its fine to discuss the movie with strangers afterwards. If people don't want to discuss- they will walk away or say so. I suppose the best thing to do- if you hear people talking about the movie, try to join in. There's probably lots of ways the conversation could go, but worth a try I suppose.

I don't go to movies a ton much anymore due to price.



Summer_Twilight
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26 Jul 2016, 7:26 am

I found one where they offer movies at half price during matinees where they aren't a major cinematic company like AMC or regal.

Anyway how do I join in on the conversations?



kraftiekortie
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26 Jul 2016, 7:36 am

As a rule of thumb, I wouldn't initiate a conversation with someone about the movie most of the time. I would answer if somebody wants to initiate, though.

However, as Earthbound stated, there could be people discussing the movie and who are speaking louder than most and seem friendly. They are a possibility.

If they don't seem to be a family, and especially if the people talking about it are males, then I might try to "put my two cents in." Same if it is a mixed-gender group. If it's all females, I might be a little more cautious

I wouldn't do this with families with kids at all, unless somebody from the family initiates it.



webplodder
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27 Jul 2016, 5:26 am

You have to be careful when talking to strangers because people don't, as a general rule, go up to someone they don't know and start talking. It's different in an emergency situation, of course, because some unexpected event can happen that makes people turn to one another for support but ordinarily you might be seen as a bit odd if you initiate a conversation, uninvited, with a stranger.

Now, it's a bit different if some nearby group is discussing a movie they have just seen in an open way (especially a family group) and this is something that Aspies find it hard to judge. It depends on the people involved, i.e. do they seem friendly and respectable or a bit sullen and aggressive? Women, in particular, have to be cautious about approaching strange men since some men can see a single woman approaching them as an invitation, which is the last thing you need. If you decide to approach someone try to pick a female or group of females or, at least, a mixed group.

You cannot expect to treat being in a movie theater the same as being at a party or similar social setting because these are specifically designed for socializing whereas the former is meant to be a public entertainment centre.

Just be careful who you approach in a cinema because you might pick on an inappropiate person or persons.



BirdInFlight
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27 Jul 2016, 6:58 am

kraftie and webplodder have said what I was about to post, particularly webplodder in regards to being a woman having to be careful who you approach. And also about a movie theater/cinema not being like a social situation such as a party or friends gathering. It's a bit more unusual and not really the "done thing" to walk up and start talking to strangers after a movie than it is to walk up and talk to strangers at a party, a bar, a club, or other gathering, where it's acceptable. Personally I would not do it.

I don't go to movies much anymore as it's too costly, but during the time when I went a lot, I always went by myself, and only once did someone ever start chatting to me afterward. It was a woman (I'm a woman too) and was at a matinee of a chick-flickish drama. I think what happened was as we all left the room, there was a kind of ""After you" situation passing through the door, and so we laughed a bit and then she said what did you think of the movie? We exchanged a few comments walking out to the lobby then said bye bye and that was it.

So, that chat really only initiated because of one of us paying a courtesy of holding the door for the other, or something. It wasn't like one of us walked up to the other person and started talking.

I would say in very general terms it would seem a bit odd to do that, and would be hard to do skilfully even for an NT without seeming a bit forward, or having the person wonder what you want from them.