Dealing with social situations

Post Reply New Topic

Hi, new here!

I had a particularly excruciating social experience at the weekend (again) which has spurred me on to seek a diagnosis. This is a fairly typical social scenario:

Groups of people, where one person is talking, fine. Larger groups with many people talking at once and I get physically uncomfortable to the point where I have to leave and go somewhere quiet. I went on the balcony and was calming down and then someone followed me and started asking if I was OK, then more people came and tried to include me in their conversation, then people start asking my partner what's wrong with me, she get's pissed off, I hear all this and just want to crawl into a corner and die.

My usual strategy in social situations is to just get blind drunk, but for obvious reasons I want to stop this. I'm hoping a diagnosis that I can explain to people will help avoid these situations. I'd really like to improve my ability to deal with social gatherings, in particular with my partner's family and friends who are all convinced I don't like them (I do!).

this is social anxiety i dealed with it for years.

people found it weird

i have lost lot of jobs and ended up as joker in social scenario

i dont think medicines can cure it

Its only after i was yelled, screamed and verbally abused and told this thing by my Manager
that i left job, went into severe depression and then i got rid of it almost

Well I guess I'm fortunate I ended up in a job where the social anxiety isn't too much of a hindrance (I'm a programmer), although I have always been the quiet guy that everyone makes fun of. Jeez just finally realising what this is, looking back over my life it explains everything, it's a real eureka moment for me.

Just realising that it's something that is and always will be normal for me and not beating myself up over it is a massive weight off my shoulders. I like some of the things I've read about having a set of open-ended questions to ask people, so I can just trot them out off the list and let them talk, I will be trying that next time I have to mingle.