Try not to take all the blame. From what little I've seen of you online, you're a good person and you don't deserve it. Of course I can't really judge without knowing more of the story, but these situations are rarely one-sided. Besides, you're only setting yourself up for further self-hatred.
I've done my fair share of putting people on a pedestal and the thing is, even if it's deserved, it doesn't really accomplish anything productive. You can judge yourself against the best person you know, and end up looking bad, or you can judge yourself against the worst person and end up looking like a paragon of virtue - and there's no logical reason to pick one of those two points of view over the other. I'd say don't judge yourself against other people at all, but that's easier said than done, so instead, just try not to take it too far and remember there are more than six billion people on the planet.