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Summer_Twilight
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Joined: 13 Sep 2011
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,252

15 Sep 2016, 2:41 pm

Hi:
I recently started playing D&D or Dungeons and Dragons with a campaign and a casual friend of mine found out and he says that he wants to play since he enjoys D&D. There is a catch, he wants me to contact him every few days and remind him when were play so he can get involved.

The reason why he wants me to remind him is because he has horrible memory issues. I have even suggested to him reminders on his phone and programming it into his calendar but he says that it doesn't work for him so he wants me to do the other. The problem with him is that he thinks his autism is worse off than it really because he's been listening to some ignorant people. So for the last decade, he's been moping around talking about how he can't do this or that for himself and I am tired of it. I do want him to play with us but I don't want him being manipulative or using me.

How do I assert myself without sounding too harsh? What other alternatives are available for people who have memory issues?



tanq
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

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Joined: 8 Sep 2016
Age: 60
Gender: Male
Posts: 63

15 Sep 2016, 4:12 pm

Maybe you can avoid the tough talk by scheduling automatic e-mails from your calendar:
https://ifttt.com/recipes/52479-schedul ... ound-email



LiveSimplyDude
Butterfly
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Joined: 16 Sep 2016
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 11
Location: Lodi, CA

19 Sep 2016, 8:56 pm

do you play on regular days?? could you tell him when to set the next couple alarms for??


if not, tell him "you can ask us when we're playing again next time, and set it in your phone. I am autistic too, and if I can manage to set a reminder, so can you. If you can't manage to set an alarm on your cell phone, maybe you aren't high functioning enough for our crew. we like you, but you've gotta be a big boy about this one, cause we can't hold your hand the ENTIRE time.."



be kind, but be firm. encourage him to be more self sufficient, ya know?