NT's playact almost all the time- why?

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What never makes sense is why NT's do this thing of making a big pretence about appreciating honesty when they actually don't mean it and don't want you to be honest. Almost never. They want you to repeat the same damn stuff that everyone is 'supposed' to say. Its like a play, on stage. Im actually way more comfortable on stage than in real social situations.. I never really know what answer they want, the scripted one or the real one.. Its baffling. Can someone please explain this to me...

I think a lot depends on the person and the setting. Would have to know the specifics of the situation you're asking about.

Like for example, there's social answers and there's answers you would only give someone you know very well.

Like for example, when my coworkers ask "how are you?" I say "Good! How are you?" I would never tell them how I REALLY feel, like if I'm having a terrible day or my cat just died or whatever because 'how are you' between coworkers or acquaintances is just a social greeting. They don't really want to hear your life story.

However if it's a friend or family member, then generally you can tell them everything.

So I guess to answer your question we would need to know more information.

That depends on how close you are with your co-workers and vice versa.

Now regarding what whirlingdervish is talking about, society in general seems to have certain expectations and norms about people and if you even live outside of the norm, you are seen as deviant. Because of the signals set out by society, people are scared to the point of being a "People pleaser." This can happen when one does not have certain traits or talents.

E.G- It's a big fad these days for one who is a lousy cook to lie to their friends and families about cooking all these things so they can look more presentable.

Other things include "Dressing to impress" even if you just shop at Goodwill or a TJ Maxx, you are expected to lie about going to Bebe or say something like "Top designer."

I have the same doubt. If someone asks "how are you?" but is not interested in knowing your current mood/health status, then why not just say "hi"? And why can't I say that I'm not feeling well if this is true? Not that I will tell my life story, I just would like to say "not really, my cat has just died". What's wrong with that? Life's too short to waste so much time and effort with these useless social clichés.

The whole "Hi, how are you?" scenario is a way of letting people know that you acknowledge them.

people will think you're boring if you always repeat the same damn stuff you're supposed to say.

at least, i will.

The 'how are you' questions and questions of similar ilk seem to be rhetorical, and not ones where folks want a sincere answer. It's like they're acting like they care, but acknowledging that they don't REALLY care.
As for other trite situations, some folks never tire of hearing the same things over and over, but some of us just get tired of it, and want to be different. That desire to be different has (at least, for me) resulted in an interesting lexicon.

responding with something other than the stock "fine, and you" in response to a "how are you" question is one
method i've used to segue into a more meaningful conversation than otherwise would have ensued.

be careful when using it around strangers.