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Summer_Twilight
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28 Feb 2017, 8:23 am

Occasionally I run into people who tend to ask me questions about why I do something.

Example - Last week, I met a new girl who found out that I moved out of state 14 years ago. She asked "Why did you move to here? Why did you pick this school?"

Another time I went to a nice and well known place which requires time consuming flight. They asked me "Why did you go there?" or "Why are you going to that destination?"

I just don't get why people have to ask those questions. So what's the reason?



saintpedrogluestick
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28 Feb 2017, 8:46 am

I think it's just polite small talk. If it isn't intensely private/personal they probably don't have that much interest in it, it's expected in conversation though.



Summer_Twilight
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28 Feb 2017, 8:56 am

How do I respond next time I get these empty pointless questions?



saintpedrogluestick
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28 Feb 2017, 8:58 am

Do you get stuck on the actual answer? I just try to address it as directly and pleasantly as possible. Then we go on with our days.



blackicmenace
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28 Feb 2017, 2:40 pm

Summer_Twilight wrote:
How do I respond next time I get these empty pointless questions?


Perhaps they want to get to know you better by learning your background. Answer them to the best of your ability I suppose even if it is not interesting to you, unless it seems like an inappropriate question. Maybe there could be an interesting story behind one of those questions that gives some insight to who you are. Then again, maybe they are just pointless questions meant to create small talk so people don't feel uncomfortable because they feel they need to say something.


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Summer_Twilight
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28 Feb 2017, 7:06 pm

The questions feel nosy and empty to me.



banana247
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02 Mar 2017, 2:03 pm

One thing I've learned about social interaction is that people generally LOVE talking about themselves. So that's a skill that I've learned about making small talk adnd friends is that you generally can't go wrong asking people to talk about themselves. It's a subject that you know the other prison will be interested in also know lots about. I have actually become good at creating small talk and making new friends in this way - people can reveal as much or little as they want, but either way you are on the path to being friends. So I think these people expect you to like to talk about yourself and a are trying to be friends, or at least be friendly. They are trying to make pleasant conversation that you would enjoy. Some people are just trying to be nosy, but mostly, your example questions seem honest and innocent.

If you'd like to maybe make friends, or just practice social skills, I would say just answer somewhat briefly but honestly and then return the question.

If you just want them to bug off, then you can give a short answer like "oh, no real reason" or "I just wanted a change" or it's a long story". The person will likely back off because they'll know you arent interested in talking... however, answering honestly and letting the conversation keep going is a better idea I think! In talking about your lives, You might find that you have something in common!



starkid
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10 Mar 2017, 6:28 pm

We can't know their reasons. There are several possible reasons, but most of them boil down to curiosity.

Most people don't travel far except for very specific reasons (job, college, etc.). So those people likely wanted to know your specific reason.