How can I bond with my newborn nephew?

Post Reply New Topic

I just have an irrational worry that he might not like me - mainly because I don't get to sew him as often as the rest if my family does, and because I'm a fairly stereotypical aspie geek and young children might find people like us to be "creepy". I still get to see him at least once a week or so. I just want the two of us to have some kind of special bond, it could be the closest to being a father I ever get

A newborn is observing, learning, differentiating and sorting without thinking about the passing of time, so I think the first key here is some simple consistency in giving him opportunity to become aware of your coming into his presence. With my first grandchild I saw weekly, I taught him his first word by raising my hand in greeting and saying "Abba!" with a smile every time I saw him and he first looked at me. You might just speak your nephew's own name or nickname rather than some other word, but it will likely not take long for him to know what to expect every time he sees you enter into his line of sight.

Rather than being concerned about being geeky or whatever, play on that a bit without taking it so far as to be scary or confusing. Reciting just a few lines of something like some Dr. Seuss poetry while adding some facial expression and vocal interpretation (funny voices) might eventually begin bringing out some smiles and even some giggles from him, and the same could be done with nursery rhymes or short songs. In whatever you do, however, do not place expectation upon him and be quick to try something different if he seems troubled or as he grows older. Overall, keep in mind he is observing, learning, differentiating and sorting in an ever-expanding world and you are hoping to ultimately be in tune with that and definitely more than a mere passing attraction.

He's a baby. And when he sees over the course of years. He'll grow to like you maybe. Maybe also he will end being an aspie too or a guy with similar interests as you. Don't be nervous about your relationship with your nephew. Just talk to him or maybe him.

Make sure, when you hold the baby, that you support the head.

Also: newborns are not exactly "choosy" in whom they want to "hang out" with. They like everybody. Nobody has any idea about "geekiness" until they reach at least preschool age. By that time, you probably would have bonded with this person enough so that this person will overlook you "geekiness" (if the person actually cares).