How on earth do you "hang out" nowadays?

Post Reply New Topic

I was wonder how people hang out in this day and age, as a past acquaintance of mine asked to hang out at some point. In my day-to-day life I just stay cooped up in my house, water my lilies, play games, and talk to my pets [lots of solitary activities] but this one acquaintance of mine that I haven't spoken to in years suggested that we plan to hang out.

I think it's a very nice idea since it would be a good change of pace, my only worry is that I don't know what you're supposed to do when hanging out with people of my age demographic [being 18 years of age]. Most people seem to think "hanging out" is just being around familiar people and doing stuff on their phones and this makes no sense to me... It's like there is no structure to their activities at all. She said that "...We can just chill and jam. Nothing fancy", but how do you just hang around and do nothing? My assumption is that you're supposed to get something out of these bonding sessions by just being around/talking to people [though I can't even imagine what it is that you get]

I don't have many social graces and tend to be overly serious in any given situation which, from what I can gather, isn't considered ideal when around most people [it doesn't really help that my voice is very monotonous and my expressions are considered "deadpan"]. It also doesn't help that the last time I hung out with someone was in 5th grade when "hanging out" meant climbing trees and playing Manhunt at night [basically nighttime hide and seek]. How do you start a conversation during such leisure time? Am I suppose to change my pitch or something...? What are you supposed to do in these types of situations [talk a lot, make jokes, just sit there, go out, etc]? What is generally considered "acceptable" to talk/joke about? I have the misfortune of having a very cynical personality with dry,dark humor that tends to upset people [though she also has similar traits, as she is into the gothic/alternative subculture and such traits seem to be very common]... Sorry for the pointless info given. Any advice or tips would be greatly welcomed/appreciated! Thank you for your time

Well hanging out just means not doing very much, just chatting and maybe doing mundane stuff like watching TV or painting your nails or something lol you don't really plan it out. Drinking coffee in a coffee shop maybe. If you're not big on small talk, you could opt to actually do something like go to the cinema or go shopping or something. It's great that you have a similar sense of humour, that's very important in a friendship.

She informed me that the ideal place to hang out would be one of our houses [which I decided hers was a better option]... She doesn't seem to want to go out to do something. I'm not really good at unstructured activities, hence why i'm generally opposed to changing my routine. If anything, I could ask about some of her interests that way the conversation is mostly one-sided with me asking a question or two while she describes whatever it is that amuses her at the time. I guess i'm lucky that we are somewhat similar [and thank you for responding]

I'm not really into "going out" myself---except out to eat or a movie.

I never got into the "club scene" or whatever.

My best friend and I liked to play card games and watch YouTube videos together. We also watched movies.

I would "hang out" similarly to how I hung out in the 1970s. Watching TV, eating, maybe board games. I don't really do many "high-tech" sorts of things.

I suppose, if I'm in the mood, I might feel a desire to show somebody a YouTube video on my phone.

All pretty good suggestions. I'll run a few of them by her and see what happens [hopefully things will go alright]

you’ll have to feel it out... If you mesh well with the friend, the open endedness probably won’t feel that awkward to you once you get with her. If you haven’t seen the person in a while, then at least there are tons of great questions you can ask about her life!

The good thing about going to the other person’s house is that you can always comment on the house or the things in the house! Lol. I like to ask, “so, do I get the grand tour?” Some people are more excited to show you stuff than others, but it’s a great way to get conversation going. Just be careful not to be too pushy if they don’t wanna let you see all the rooms or something.

But the tour can often turn into an activity too, because the person shows you a room that has a game, music instrument, movie rack, or something else that interests you... you ask about it or comment on it... and before you know it, you’re playing the game, watching the movie, or getting a mini concert from your friend! Haha. A lot of times the other person will offer these things, but you can also just ask, “wow, can we play it now?” or “play something for me!” etc. if you’re excited about something of the persons, it usually flatters them and they want to show you more.