Feel like people won't like me because I don't drink

Page 1 of 1 [ 7 posts ] 

Joe90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 26,492
Location: UK

24 May 2018, 10:49 am

I don't like drinking alcohol, apart from the odd beer every now and then, or a small glass of wine or champaign at Christmas, but otherwise I do not drink alcohol. When people ask if I drink and I say no, I feel like they think there's something wrong with me. I know a lot of people, and the only one who has never been drunk in their life before is a friend of mine with Fragile-X. Otherwise EVERYBODY has been drunk at least once in their lives.

I feel like not being a drinker will affect me socially my whole life. It probably explains why people at work are only friends with me at work and not outside of work. There IS more things in life you can do with friends other than drinking alcohol at a bar, but for some reason most people seem to think that just because you don't like drinking it means you don't like socialising.

People my age who don't drink only don't drink because they have kids or don't have the money or have a demanding job with early shifts. But me, my excuse is that I just don't like drinking.

Reasons I dislike drinking:-

-I don't want to lose my self-awareness
-I have a serious phobia of vomiting
-I don't like the feeling of alcohol going to my head or making my legs feel funny (this is probably the 'drunkest' I've ever been)
-Other drunk people worry me

Another thing that annoys me about drinking is how it's so accepted by society to get drunk and act like a hooligan, even though you can control how much you drink, and drunk people can be scary and unpredictable, but if you have a mental problem like Schitzephrenia or are a bit different like autism, or something, people judge you and treat you like a freak, even though we CAN'T help mental disorders.

I just think the trend of getting drunk is an embarrassment to humankind.


_________________
Female


kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

24 May 2018, 10:54 am

I like you fine. Trust me.

I don't drink.

Most respectable people will not mind it if you don't drink.

If you feel self-conscious, just drink a coke, and tell them there's rum in it......



coalminer
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 15 Nov 2017
Gender: Male
Posts: 169
Location: U.S.A.

24 May 2018, 11:17 am

I don't intend on drinking either. Alcohol smells way too strong, and I doubt it tastes any better. I hate going into breweries with my parents because of how bad they smell.

But I think that drinking being so commonplace is the exact reason why people have respect for those who never drink. A while ago, I was watching a TED Talk where the speaker mentioned that he's never had alcohol in his 30- to 40-something life, and the audience applauded him. Staying sober for life requires a lot of resistance to peer pressure, and so people could look up to you for it.


_________________
They say perfection is the ultimate imperfection. Or maybe that's just what I say.


whatamievendoing
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Aug 2016
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,336
Location: Finland

24 May 2018, 2:33 pm

There's no denying that drinking in social gatherings is generally at least condoned - in some ways, possibly even encouraged - but I wouldn't worry so much about it if I were you. If people dislike you simply because you don't like to touch alcohol, they're some of the most shallow people imaginable.


_________________
“They laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at them because they're all the same.”
― Kurt Cobain


RavenShark
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 22 May 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 34

26 May 2018, 11:17 am

I really detest the taste of any alcoholic drink, all I can taste is burning bitterness, and the fact that it's empty calories makes me like it less. I'm genetically prone to being chubby but I keep it under control, and I feel alcohol seriously undermines my hard work. I do end up drinking a little bit, because there's always a jerk that has to throw in a stupid comment (real life example: You're not drinking? What are you, Muslim?). I don't tolerate being "roasted" since I have a hard time distinguishing between insults and playful remarks.



Joe90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 26,492
Location: UK

26 Jun 2018, 11:57 am

Everybody I work with drink. Well, the ones age 18-35 all drink and nearly every Monday they stand there talking about all the stuff that happened at the bars on Saturday night and what them and their mates did and how drunk they got and who threw up and who brought who home, etc. I do feel left out, even though it's not something I'd like to do, but even so it still doesn't stop me from feeling like an alien. I generally don't feel like an alien, but when it comes to hearing NTs talking about how fantastic getting drunk is, I suddenly DO feel like an alien, and then depression kicks in.
I do love socialising but just not in a bar on weekend nights where there are lots of young people getting drunk. It's a social phobia nightmare. But I like socialising at work, and when the others are talking about getting blotto, I just have to sit and listen and it's dead boring. I try to act interested, but because they all probably think I'm a boring nerd because of not being into drinking at nightclubs, I feel quite excluded from the conversation.

Many people don't know what I mean, they just say "oh if you want to go out, go out. If you don't like going out then don't worry about it." But my feelings about this are more illogical than that. It's like I'm ashamed of disliking something. Please, does anybody else get this feeling and do you know what I'm talking about?


_________________
Female


Okkano
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 15 Jun 2018
Age: 22
Gender: Male
Posts: 72
Location: Germany

01 Jul 2018, 3:07 pm

For me it would be the reverse, i hate alcohol too, i'd like you to not drink.
I wouldn't want to be with people socially forcing me to drink.
(yes in germany you can legally already drink with 14 under conditions)

Good ways/excuses to acceptably not drink would be asian flush, allergic to alchol, diabetic, recovering alcoholic, or you started taking some meds that really can't cope well with alcohol. Some people will even show sympathy for your situation (don't ask me why)
Yes it would likely be lying, but that choice is up to you.


_________________
Is there a reason to judge somebody for seeking contact?
Those who know who they are: think again