shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
Alita
It is hard to imagine Amy Lee b***h has social anxiety
However I am not telepathic
Worse things could have happened, besides panic attacks, that she did not tell me about. (Fine).
But I am not a stalkers so I do not know "the truth"
Often she did not phone me to cancel
Sometimes she cancelled with insufficient notice
Usually she did not apologize or acknowledge the inconvenience she caused
In any event, the cancelling occurred a bit too often
Of course, I wasn't making any comment on this person who you know better than I do. I just don't think all people can be painted with the same brush. Obviously she should have acknowledged the inconvenience. It would be hard to be friends and continue making plans with someone who constantly cancels with little notice.
Mind you, not everyone is up to admitting why they cancel - for a long time, I didn't want to acknowledge I had social anxiety because of the stigma. I would just say I wasn't feeling well if I didn't want to go out, and the anxiety wouldn't hit me until literally the last day, building like labour contractions until I felt physically sick.
Once I pushed through, it would usually be okay, but many times I asked myself if it should really be this hard having some semblance of a social life??? Like, maybe some of us were just meant to be loners. Even when I'm at a party, I usually end up hanging out somewhere outside with the artists and misfits and other loner people. They're my crowd and I can deal with that.
What I can't deal with is the *society* people who are putting on a show, swanning around and trying to impress each other while putting down their competition...and the emotional soup of different implied meanings and nuances of communication is just a nightmare. I feel like I'm literally escaping from jail whenever I leave places like that.
It got to the point that I had to take a separate car whenever I accompanied my family to a do because I didn't know if I would want to stay as long as they did. Having parents who don't even acknowledge Asperger's as a condition certainly didn't help.
Anyway, rabbiting. I hope you weren't offended by my comment. I support you in your feelings. If people don't want to make an effort with you, speak up and let them explain themselves. If their reasons aren't good enough, dump them. Find a better crowd, you deserve the respect.
_________________
"There once was a little molecule who dreamed of being part of the crest of a great wave..."
(From the story 'The Little Molecule' - Amazon Kindle, 2013)