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I’ve got no friends and it ain’t fair

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aspie 777
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07 Jan 2020, 11:03 am

Only had a few friends throughout my life and I want some but I struggle making them so what shall I do?



kraftiekortie
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07 Jan 2020, 11:10 am

What are your interests?



aspie 777
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07 Jan 2020, 11:12 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
What are your interests?

ps4, going for walks, getting tattoos, clothes shopping, reading books mainly self help ones and listening to music which I do quite a lot.



Fnord
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07 Jan 2020, 11:16 am

Do you have a job? Do you have your own place to live?


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kraftiekortie
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07 Jan 2020, 11:20 am

I would advise you reading other books in addition to self-help books.

Self-help might be good guides for a few things...but are not exactly great literature or even good psychology.



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07 Jan 2020, 12:02 pm

aspie 777 wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
What are your interests?

ps4, going for walks, getting tattoos, clothes shopping, reading books mainly self help ones and listening to music which I do quite a lot.


Sometimes gamers make friends with others in a gaming community. That could be something to look into.



jimmyjazzuk
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10 Jan 2020, 2:46 pm

volunteer



aspie 777
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10 Jan 2020, 4:09 pm

jimmyjazzuk wrote:
volunteer

where in U.K. you from?



jimmyjazzuk
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10 Jan 2020, 4:48 pm

Reading



pyrrhicwren
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11 Jan 2020, 11:47 am

aspie 777 wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
What are your interests?

ps4, going for walks, getting tattoos, clothes shopping, reading books mainly self help ones and listening to music which I do quite a lot.


That sounds really cool. Maybe people in your area aren't on your level. Real friends are rare and valuable. I have the same struggles and my interests are way out there in comparison to surface level fair weather hang outs. It's not my desire to have a network of phonies so I am lucky to have few friends.


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Fnord
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11 Jan 2020, 1:59 pm

aspie 777 wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
What are your interests?
ps4, going for walks, getting tattoos, clothes shopping, reading books mainly self help ones and listening to music which I do quite a lot.
Again, do you have a job and your own place to live?


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Abstract_Logic
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13 Jan 2020, 1:30 am

Fnord wrote:
aspie 777 wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
What are your interests?
ps4, going for walks, getting tattoos, clothes shopping, reading books mainly self help ones and listening to music which I do quite a lot.
Again, do you have a job and your own place to live?


I don't see how having a job and one's own place to live matters in making friends. I mean, a job would be beneficial if the kind of friends one is looking for frequently do things that would require a steady living income, and having one's own place to live would be beneficial if one frequently entertains guests. But for Internet friends, not really.


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Abstract_Logic
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13 Jan 2020, 1:33 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
I would advise you reading other books in addition to self-help books.

Self-help might be good guides for a few things...but are not exactly great literature or even good psychology.


I second this.

To the OP: Are you interested in science fiction or fantasy? What kind of video games do you play on PS4?


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Fnord
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13 Jan 2020, 9:40 am

Abstract_Logic wrote:
Fnord wrote:
aspie 777 wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
What are your interests?
ps4, going for walks, getting tattoos, clothes shopping, reading books mainly self help ones and listening to music which I do quite a lot.
Again, do you have a job and your own place to live?
I don't see how having a job and one's own place to live matters in making friends. I mean, a job would be beneficial if the kind of friends one is looking for frequently do things that would require a steady living income, and having one's own place to live would be beneficial if one frequently entertains guests. But for Internet friends, not really.
Because being jobless and either homeless or living with relatives tends to lessen one's social opportunities.

Besides, it seems that the OP is ignoring me, so it's likely that the OP does not really want workable solutions.


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kraftiekortie
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13 Jan 2020, 9:55 am

The less you obsess about making friends----the more friends you will probably make.

People are usually put off by people who seem "too eager" to make friends.



AprilR
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13 Jan 2020, 10:11 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
The less you obsess about making friends----the more friends you will probably make.

People are usually put off by people who seem "too eager" to make friends.


Yes that's true. Your value doesn't Come from other people, you're valuable just because you're a human being. Not having friends doesn't make you worthless.