Coworker kept asking to be "friends"

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Been working at home Depot for two years and nine months as lot attendant. Alberto has been working there longer.

For the past half year or so, Alberto has been talking to me way too much. He could say that he was friendly, but I just find him annoying. He has tried to make conversation by asking if I have a girlfriend, what other jobs I worked at, and where I live. "Loose lips sink ships". Past couple of weeks, the annoying lil dipshit has had the nerve to tell me that I said that he could be my "friend" "no strings attached". But I never said anything like that. About six weeks ago I was trying to spot him on the forklift and he almost hit me. I think he was driving recklessly, but what is "reckless" is subjective. I asked him to slow down and he had the nerve to tell me that he was in a hurry because it was the end of his shift. Other times the ass hole had the nerve to laugh at me. Two times, I told him that if I could help him, please tell me but please don't say my name or *fist bump*. He had the nerve to tell me "you're crazy". One time he playfully punched me, but that was not ok with me. I don't understand why the lil rat bastard wanted me to be his friend so desperately. He could be friends with anyone else in the building. I am autistic and often do not even feel like talking. There is no way that he would conse to saying "excuse me" instead of "what".

Yesterday the idiot had the nerve to call me on the intercom. (Lot attendants can't hear the PA announcements when lot attendants are outside.). Told him that. The fuckface had the nerve to tell me that he would tell the cops to call an Amber Alert for me. Told him, do not do that and that is not funny. (But it sounds like something he would do). He made me load 15 bricks but he could have done it himself easily

Today, the lil riffraff had the nerve to call me by name when he saw me and he told me to push a cart to Receiving. Without screaming I asked him not to call me by name or fist bump if he saw me. He also remained calm and said "you don't have to take it to Receiving. It's all good."

The rest of the day I was paranoid he tattled me to a manager and the manager is going to make my worthless corpse redundant.

And I felt guilty because Alberto might be autistic or something like that and I was not a good role model. He's 24 and I am 40

And I feel desperate because maybe nobody else will ever want to be my "friend" again

But it appeared that I finally got through to the overgrown child

Although things are not always the way they appear

Honestly, that kind of behavior isn't OK whether he's autistic or not. There are limits to what sorts of things being autistic should let people off the hook for.

As far as nobody ever wanting to be your friend again. I highly doubt that. Unless you're the sort that is known for murdering your friends, there are people out there that would probably get on with you just fine.

hmmm... Sounds like a handful....of stufff you do not need to or should have to deal with at your place of Employment .!

Short answer is if you have a problem with a coworker you can't resolve you should talk to your boss about it.

You don't want him to say your name? Should he get your attention by saying "hey you" instead?

On the one hand, he could just be an immature, overly-gregarious 20-something that has either never met an autistic person before or is deliberately messing with you for his amusement.

On the other hand, if a guy was overly friendly with me (especially interest in my love life) and offered to be my friend "no strings attached" I would suspect he's gay and making a pass at me. I think the lack of relationships and subtly eccentric behavior of many autistic men can be misinterpreted by others as hidden homosexuality. Although, at least in my case, the situation was reversed: I was the one in my 20s and it was the older man who I thought was making a pass at me. (Both times this has happened to me were fortunately outside of a work environment. Disturbingly, the second and more subtle one turned out to be a registered sex offender.)

Yes. 'No strings attached' is a very odd thing for someone to say if they just want to be friends.

I agree with the other people here: this Alberto guy was trying to flirt with you or something. This situation sounds very complicated and someone to keep well away from if possible.

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Annoying Alberto and I work in the same building, often at the same time. It is not possible to stay away from him at all times. And I do not have a "right" to take out a restraining order against him, b/c he has not, thus far, done anything to justify a restraining order. However, home depot is public, and there are videotapes, and, thus far, i have not once been alone with Annoying Alberto.

Flirting is not illegal or against Home Depot standard operating procedure or immoral. There is nobody to tattle to. And I am afraid that if I tattle to the boss, the boss will take Annoying Alberto's side. Maybe the boss is having sex with annoying alberto. everyone has subconscious biases. annoying alberto could tell the boss that he was just trying to be "friendly", or annoying alberto could deny that he did or said anything.

also, even though home depot has videotapes, the managers have no access to the videotapes. only loss prevention has access to the videotapes, to look for illegal activity.

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Yes, "no strings attached" is a very odd thing to say, I understand and agree. However, precious lil "people" sometimes say odd things. Certainly, I have said plenty of odd things, not always with negative intentions, hidden motives, or underlying issues.

Even though I have been working there two years and nine months and annoying alberto has worked there longer, i have not observed that many interactions between annoying alberto and anyone else. as a result, i do not know if annoying alberto treats anyone else the same way he treats me. (zero standard of reference).

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In some situations, talking to the boss about coworkers could be a good thing. At Home Depot, it appears to me, that the managers do not really have that many skills, such as critical thinking. Everyone has subconscious biases. Home Depot does not require that employees practice "due diligence", "due process", or critical thinking. Home Depot only requires that employees "do their best". I think that the manager's "best", is not that great. Besides, I am paranoid that annoying alberto is having sex with the boss, and no matter what bad and wrong things annoying alberto does, the boss will still take annoying alberto's side.

it's not that i do not want him to say my name. it's that i do not want him to loudly scream my name from a long distance away, for no good reason.

You can't measure "maturity". Immaturity is not illegal, immoral, bad, or wrong. I am not particularly mature either. There is no correct amount of "gregariousness". Maybe he has never met an autistic before. However, I did not tell him that I am autistic.

Home Depot hires convicted felons. I do not have a legal or moral "right" to know which employee got convicted of which felony. Not only that, but I do not even know annoying alberto's last name. So I could not do any internet research.

Well, that's a rather abrupt leap in logic.

I'm wondering if you quoted the right person there because I didn't suggest taking out a restraining order, nor did I suggest tattling to the boss, nor did I mention videotapes.

If you don't mind Alberto flirting with you, go right ahead.

You seem rather protective of Alberto here. Perhaps you would actually like to be friends with him? Maybe he's not as bad as you were telling us he was?

I've been through this so many times... It really is many times worse now than it was, just 10 years ago. What is with all the workplace parties, diversity picnics, motivational mettings everyday - it's just something every single day and it unbearable. I just want to do my job and go home. It's like a cult. If you have a mind of your own and want to be left alone, your screwed. I'm on SSI now, I just can't deal with it.

interesting i made a post to this thread yesterday that was meant to be supportive of possible idea of friendship.
But maintaining distance....but worded much longer, with more ideas..And here I see next day my post did not get to this thread??????

I can't imagine what happened to your post, Jakki, how strange!

Anyway, I've generally found that these people who are desperate to be friends don't stay friends for very long. When it's happened to me, the person was generally looking for something I couldn't give them e.g. to solve their life problems.

Or they thought I was one type of person but found out I wasn't e.g. rich and posh, but I'm neither.

Over eager friends are best avoided I find. I prefer the slow way of making friends.