No desire to socialize
Im in times that I'm constantly pondering my current situation. Because that might be the sign of depression. I dont want to chat with anyone (small talk). I hate warmth,intimacy and friendships.
When i have a nose round, i see people joking, having small talk. It seems tedious to me. I rarely sit among people and that feels forced and boring. If i could find a like minded friend / companion who doesnt like small talk, it might be different. Why don't I have the desire or am I depressed ?
What are your opinions or suggestions on this ?
You are an introverted Autistic man. It is a bad set of cards to hold. Most people especially NTs do not want to deal with an Autistic introvert. Men are supposed to be initiators and sociable in order to obtain jobs, friends and relationships. Autism and introversion stand in the way of you obtaining happiness in life.
Agreed. The question is how to find such a like minded friend / companion.
What are your hobbies/interests, if any? If you have not done so already, perhaps you could look on Meetup.com for local groups devoted to some hobby/interest of yours.
Alternatively, you could look for a local support group or social group for adults on the autism spectrum.
Also, to maximize your chances of finding a friend here on Wrong Planet, I would suggest that you edit your profile to include: (1) your geographic location (don't be specific enough to endanger your privacy, but do include at least your country and, if you live in a large country, your state/province/region and/or nearest major metro area), and (2) a signature line mentioning your interests/hobbies.
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- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.
I feel the same way, it's sort of like other people get something from socialising that I don't. I like interesting conversations but, otherwise, being around people is just a burden and not something I enjoy.
Finding people with similar hobbies as mentioned above is probably good advice, but it can be harder than it sounds. For instance, I like games, but I don't like most of the games that other people play. There's also the issue that NT people often have a more surface-level understanding of their hobbies & interests than a lot of autistic people, who may tend to be more obsessive on mechanics & minutiae.
I have no solution for that, unfortunately, but posting is pretty fun
Finding people with similar hobbies as mentioned above is probably good advice, but it can be harder than it sounds. For instance, I like games, but I don't like most of the games that other people play. There's also the issue that NT people often have a more surface-level understanding of their hobbies & interests than a lot of autistic people, who may tend to be more obsessive on mechanics & minutiae.
I have no solution for that, unfortunately, but posting is pretty fun
Suggestion: Here on Wrong Planet, and in any other forum you post in, edit your profile to include a signature line that mentions your hobbies, including your specific favorite games.
There are no guarantees, but hopefully you might be able to attract a few potential friends that way.
_________________
- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.