Self Hijacking Mechanisms

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Do you ever meet someone and think, 'we have a lot in common and could be good friends'.
So you get to know them better and realise that you really do have a lot in common and enjoy their company. Then you think, hang on.. they are being phoney, they are just pretending so that they can get close to me. So you withdraw.
Whats all that about ?

I think it called astuteness.

I don't think anyone would deliberately want to be my friend without an ulterior motive - I had some friends at school/uni but found they just wanted help with work and when we weren't at school they didn't want to know.
I have had some good conversations with people who were probably AS but it is hard to keep those friendships going as neither side is good at making the effort.

That's sort of the same way with me. I have a few good friends, but other people who are my "friends" just seem like they get want they want out of me and then they forget I ever existed.

Well that may be true, but what if they did not have an ulterior motive or agenda.
That's what i mean. All relationships are hijacked whether or not the other person is using you.

Have you ever considered that wanting to be friends with someone is a motive of its own? Does that make sense to you? Why do you want a friend? I'm sure there's a motive...

I think there's always a motive, but some motives are good, bad or neutral. Anyway, this is my first post on wrong planet! Just feel like posting today

Like groucho marx i wouldn't want to be a member of any club that would have me.

that just makes me sick. why are people like that? f**k! f**k them!

That's our life
which is our lie
everyone will wear a mask
to protect themselves from the noxious gas
that we choke each other with
when alone we'll die within the flask
which will cure the farce
and that's who WE are
who isn't far from whom we're not
as we buy another cask

thats nice Danielismyname, i will buy another flask, sometime sooner or later.

Withdraw? Sometimes I just drop off the face of the Earth. It's pretty subconscious though, and probably for reasons other than the ones you gave. I am especially unlikely to return phone calls. I don't know why. I feel horrible about it, but I still hate calling people back.

I do this too... I just forget. And sometimes getting up the nerve to call someone can be really hard. But then I know people called because they want something, and when I call and people ignore me I don't really like it... so I know its rude.

It may well be that such people who want to be friends or want something of someone, are genuine in their conscious mind to a greater extent, however (depending on the circumstances of a relationship) they could well have ulterior motifs whether intentional or unintentional. On the whole I would say that if someone (especially those living with AS) feel and or are used by another person, then it is probably true. Some people that have AS are easy targets thus are vulnerable and if it is to be found that the person who done the using profited in some way, then it is true, such people targeted the AS person. People with AS should be careful about who they mix with and question the motifs of all. Moreover a male should be very careful of a woman, because women are less sensitive than males. Also males with AS are more sensitive than other males and of course woman. Baring in mind too that more males than females live with the condition AS.

As I understand AS is a Jewish thing mostly, genetically within the blood, so to speak. There is no real need for friendships, but there is a need for social interaction. I don’t consider that I have any friends but as someone living with AS and with a dynamic, charismatic, open and friendly personality, I have many more associates than that of a normal generic human being.

After all, Jesus’ own kind killed him. Because he told the truth. His disciples run away when he was being attacked and victimised. Scared of their own lives and what people would think. Living with AS means that one is more open and as well as maybe telling the truth, certainly are open with others about how they feel and what they think of other sand situations. In general people, moreover in the UK, do not like to deal with reality. They may feel targeted if as a result of someone with AS making demands in many respects. Most people hide away and to a greater extend live strange lives in that they suffer from not knowing who they are. Identity crisis. People with AS on the other hand should know who they are and what they are capable of and find like minded people in order to become!