When you are told a new social truth do you...

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Become bitter, or just accept it and try to acclimate yourself?

I very often become bitter. I build up an expectation and acceptance of how the world works in my head. If something I have held to be true for a very long time, suddenly gets flipped upside down by what really happens it the world it is difficult for me to accept. The way I think is so ideal in my head... I'd rather change the world than change the way I work.

I slowly just accept it and try to change myself... but it's difficult.

I seem to become bitter for a period of time and then realize that it does me no good to be bitter. I then try to find ways to change my behaviour to fit the social standard, but it is a gradual process. There is no way for me to change overnight. Though I judge it based on if it is something I can actually change within reason and logic as something that is worthwhile. I do not want to change what makes me who I am totally. That would make me just another person who tries to whore themselves out to society just to fit into their standards despite those standards making any sense whatsoever.

Back in 2002, at the very beginning of the month of April, I've told a very bitchy staff member at my clubhouse about the reputation of being a Cockney Rebel that I was getting at my first job, without realizing what a b***h she was. She told me that I seemed rough around the edges and that I did go nuts with my accent, when she first met me. I've told her that I've developed quite a temper at that job, because I was stuck doing the simple stuff, and I wasn't given any stimulation, and it got to the point where I've pushed a table to the side. That b***h told me that was too bad. I was complaining to all of the members at my clubhouse who would listen to me. They were on my side. I was waking up at 9:30, instead of my usual 5 in the morning. My bedroom would become very messy and I was putting off clearing my floor for three to four days at a time. I went into a panic, every time that I was the word April, anywhere. I've had a very long history with that month, so that was understandable. It got to the point that I was avoiding that woman, and I didn't stay at the clubhouse for Thursday evenings for the longest time. I now accept that truth, and that staff person has been gone for four years.

Sid

Sid,

I love to see your big lovable self back on WP, you are missed when you are away. Isn't it the truth, though, that we get analysed and criticized and then those people rotate out and we are still here. . .

Sometimes it takes a lot to learn to progress.

Merle

Social truth? What, you mean like those unspoken rules and whatnot? Mainly I ignore it. If people want to act illogically, let them. I'll be who I am, and I'll say what I mean and mean what I say. Simple. What you see is what you get.

Yeah, I hate suddenly learning how I've been screwing up with people for the past 41 years. I kind of miss the days when I was blissfully unaware of my faux pas, but I'm getting better at accepting myself and realizing that I'm never going to automatically know how to act in social situations. I remember that my first formal exposure to "social truths" was 20 years ago in my college sociology class. I threw fits and yelled at that professor nearly every class period, because the stuff he said made absolutely no sense to me. I knew I didn't think the way he claimed people did, and I drove him absolutely nuts arguing. I had a 96 average in that class, and yet he gave me a B because I shouted at him in front of the class. By the time I graduated, he'd been promoted to dean of the liberal arts school and I had to shake his hand when I received my diploma. I have a photo of this, and it's so funny. I've got this big open-mouthed grin on my face, like WOOT!! and I knew he was thinking how happy he was to finally get rid of me!!

I seem to either feel shocked and not know what to do... things get to me and I get down...
or
I take it really well and in my stride lol.

Damn brain. lol

Thanks for sharing, Merle! I figured I wasn't the only one who'd experienced this. Don't you think it's ironic that those same profs would most likely be smooching our butts and "valuing our alternative viewpoints" now that we're diagnosed?! LMAO!

Learn to mock it.

I basically don't care anymore. I tried for years to abide by "so-called" social rules and still didn't fit in. After I hit 35 I started writing my "own" rules.