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Praetor2379
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17 Mar 2008, 7:54 pm

kay, long story short. In December I saw a girl who I hadn't seen in a while. She offered me a seat beside her on the bus and we talked for a good fifteen minutes, Ive seen her a few times since and she's always waved at me. I recently tried adding her to facebook, and right after I sent her an invite she deleted her account. WTF? I know this has to do with me. I am very anxious about this. I dont want to get into trouble. I didn't say or do anything illegal. Im freaking out.


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Pobodys_Nerfect
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17 Mar 2008, 8:30 pm

You're probably asking the wrong people lol. I am finding that my few friends are being extra nice but then letting me down over arrangements etc. it seems like they don't really like me anymore. I think I've pissed them all off. I don't know. Is this kind of what you're saying? She acted really nice to your face but then behind you back doesn't like you. But then why act overly nice to your face?



Praetor2379
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17 Mar 2008, 8:33 pm

Yeah, why ask me to sit beside her on the bus when she could have just not talked to me.


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Pobodys_Nerfect
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17 Mar 2008, 8:43 pm

Maybe it's a mind game thing to try to bring us down? Put us in two minds? But why would they want to do that? Are they jealous or what? I spend much of my time trying to work it out. :(



Praetor2379
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17 Mar 2008, 8:51 pm

Pobodys_Nerfect wrote:
Maybe it's a mind game thing to try to bring us down? Put us in two minds? But why would they want to do that? Are they jealous or what? I spend much of my time trying to work it out. :(


I fail to understand


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pakled
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17 Mar 2008, 9:16 pm

I suspect that she likes you, but only at a certain distance. She's uncomfortable letting you any closer. I gave up trying to understand some people a long time ago...;)



wsmac
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17 Mar 2008, 9:26 pm

I'd say... SLOW DOWN!

Are you just guessing that her closing the facebook account had to do with you?
Would she have known it was you who was trying to add her to your facebook account? I don't use facebook so I don't know how it works.



I say this every time someone comes here with a question like yours..... ASK HER! :wink:

The only way you will know the truth or at least have a real chance of knowing the truth is to ask her directly face-to-face, write her a letter/note, call her, or email her.

Now... you might ask folks here what to say to her...

Have you seen her on the bus or elsewhere since the facebook event?
Next time you see her, you might mention that you see she closed her facebook account, then she if she replies to that comment.

Also, you might think about how you feel about her and what sort of relationship you want with her.
Don't think about what you imagine she wants or doesn't want... just what you want for now.
Once you answer that.. you should be able to figure out what to say next to her.

If you just want to be friends, you can approach it that way... "Hi, I see your facebook account is closed. I like to use mine to keep in touch with friends I don't see often." or something else in that vein.

If you like her more than that... you might just ask her out for a snack or coffee/tea before or after you two ride the bus together.
Is there a coffee/tea shop somewhere close to the bus route that you two could duck into for a short break?
Do you know of any interests of hers?
Say she was into a particular artist... you discover a book that shows some of that artist's work... you two meet on the bus and you bring out the book and start a conversation about it. Maybe you suggest the two of you drop into a coffee shop to look at the book and have a friendly chat.

It's sorta sad... because I can think up all these things for other people... but I can't do them myself.

Anyway, I hope you see her again and have the opportunity and the will to find out where you two stand.
:D


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pinkbowtiepumps
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17 Mar 2008, 11:29 pm

If she didn't like you, I'm sure there would be signs (tone of voice, facial expression, etc.) whenever you came into contact with her.

This actually just happened with one of my friends, but it turned out he was fed up with facebook altogether, so he just deleted his account. I don't blame him. I bet the timing was a coincidence. I would try asking her next time you see her, be like "I found a funny video that reminded me of you, and I tried to send it to you on facebook, but couldn't... did you get rid of your account?" and I'm sure she'll give you some logical answer. If she hesitates, then there may be a problem she isn't telling you.

I wish people wouldn't put facebook on this pinnacle of proper social conduct...



RainKing
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18 Mar 2008, 6:19 pm

You actually can't tell if the person deleted her facebook or she blocked you 8O . I know someone who blocked me. We were friends (but not real friends, although we were roommates), but then he blocked me, so I can't see him anywhere on the site even though he's still there (he can't see me either).