how many friends do you have?

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how many friends do you guys have?

This is a very difficult question to answer.
I have some web friends, and the list is not very short (see my FRIENDS page on my website). On this list, there are friends I have known online for a few years and also people I have known for a few weeks only, but whom I enjoy talking with on messagers.
As for real life friends, there are three people besides my family who I sometimes meet, and some people from college who were nice to me during the year, but I have no news from them and we rarely talk.

To be frank, I do not really know who I can really consider a friend. I do not really know where the limit is between acquaintances, pals and friends.

I know lots of people ~ mostly family and work colleagues but I don't have anyone I would really define as 'friend'.

I think that in order for people to be truly a friend they have to know a lot about you and I generally tend to avoid people getting to know me because it becomes too complicated.

I really don't know how people manage to have lots of friendships ~ it would be too stressfull.

I have two preferred friends.

I have no close friends, but a few distant friends and acquaintances.

No friends except for my husband. I find having friends tiring and burdening. I had kind of started making a friend over the past year but found her to be far too clingy.

I find making and keeping friends difficult because most of the time I can't be bothered, or forget to keep in touch.

Offline I have a few acquaintances/casual 'friends', most of whom I have worked with in previous jobs, none of whom I have seen in over a year and occasionally email. They are mostly guys with similar interests/taste in music to me unsurprisingly, so we had some good alternating monologues (i.e. geeky conversations), lol. I also have a proper friend who I see every couple of months when I can drag him away from his new girlfriend for a few hours - he is seriously laidback, funny and likes most of the same stuff I do. We have been mates for about 8 years since we met at uni as the only two freaks in a business school (needless to say neither of us have ended up as managers... ). My best friend is Mel though, we just get each other and always have.

Online I have a few friends also, mostly people I have met here, who know who they are.

Dunc (who feels he has quite enough of a social life really - who needs to leave the house?)

I haven't got any friends at all. My online friends have stopped talking to me online...

This is a very common issue for most autistic
spectrum people, myself included. We become,
not so much they(NT friend), become clingy.
I for example have one good friend and I am
even then clingy. It is either out of desperation
to have someone to talk to, or be around.



Another issue in the autistic spectum. I and other
autistic persons tend to lose track of time in our
obsessions, and really don't know how to maintain
a fluent friendship. I wish I could solve it,
but not all lifelong issues have solutions, and I
say thanks to www.wrongplanet.net for allowing
at least a outlet. Here's a idea! A WrongPlanet
convention so we can meet face to face and
allow us to explore this communication barrier.
Hmmm? just a IDEA!

I've always thought about the possibility of all of us meeting. It might be a bit costly, though.

I think I have two friends IRL.

I've thought that would be cool too, but I found a number of problems:

Finding a centralized location that's relatively convenient for the international menbers

Many members are unemployed and wouldn't be able to afford to come

The crowd would make many members uncomfortable

Many members likely present themselves better and
communicate better online

Some members want to remain anonymous

Problems finding a facility that will not cause anybody to have sensory issues.


Maybe I will be lucky enough to come accross some members and introduce myself to them in person someday.

hell, i can't count

heh, well, in truth, very few... almost all long distance due to college

Counting friends has always been difficult.

For one thing, I moved several times over the past 20 years, and in other cases people I got to know and like ended up moving away. Some of them I only talk to once a year and maybe see every two or three years, and yet when we do see each other there is still an immediate sense of bonding that tells me that things haven't really changed between us.

A larger problem, for me at least, is knowing where to draw the line between friend and acquaintance, particularly in the work environment where people are kind to each other but don't socialize outside of work. Often I think the relationships are stronger in one direction than the other.

Relationships that start online are even more confusing. Is it possible to be "friends" with someone you've never met? I might find someone I enjoy chatting online, but if you take away my internet access then what part of my life do they impact? When I tell my secrets to someone who lives on another continent are they being my friend or are we just playing amateur psychologist with each other?

Anyway, to answer the question: Over the last 25 years I have developed 3 close, intimate friends, two of which live thousands of miles away. I have 4 or 5 more who understand me and like me, but with whom contact is rare and fleeting. I have an office full of people who seem to like me but don't really know me. More recently I have 3 new on-line correspondents, all of whom I plan to meet in the coming months.

Currently I have two friends. One lives nearby, the other lives about 200 miles away.

The friend I am closest with is the one who lives 200 miles away. I haven’t seen him in a few years and have only recently regained contact with him. Over the last several years he has become anxiety ridden and increasingly avoidant. In spite of the time we have been apart, I still feel he is the closest friend I have.

My other friend who lives much closer is a true friend, but we have very little in common these days. We have known each other for sixteen years. Much of our conversation is simply nostalgia, “hey, remember that time when…” followed by “wow, I can’t believe that was so long ago!” This is a difficult friendship; we are two very different people at this time.

Now that Samantha's dumped me, the only freinds I have are a few guys online, all of which live too far away...NT's(like Samantha)don't want me, and there are no Aspies in my area...I met a few cool kids at camp last year, but they were all from South Jersey which is too far away.

P. S. Samantha is a spitting image of Katie Holmes.

Last edited by 171NewYork on 21 Apr 2005, 12:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.