Exploiting "nothing to lose"?

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If you're around someone where you have nothing to lose, do you drop all pretense of civility? For example there's a professional association I attend to learn new methodologies in my profession. Some people roll their eyes when I show up and essentially demonstrate they wish I wasn't there. I decided to socially not try at all around this handful of people. If they are in the way of the drink table, I just push past them and don't bother saying "excuse me". If someone asks me what I think of one of their consulting firms, I say I think he's rude, condescending and hard to deal with.

I had a neighbor throw a shoe at our car as we drove by (I'm pretty sure it's because of my Aspie traits). I filed criminal mischief charges against her, sent a notice to the school where she volunteers that she's violent and not to be in the presence of my kids. I also listed her on www.rottenneighbor.com. And I flip her the bird every time I see her when no one else but her is looking.

I could give other examples and other people, but you get the idea.

You might have nothing to lose with them, but other people would hear about it and you would end up with a reputation as an ***hole even amongst people whom you have never met.

Reputation counts for a lot amongst NTs- 'get a reputation for being early and you can turn up any time you like'

Also, there may come a time in the future when you need help from a neighbour or colleague- it's never a good idea to burn your bridges just for the hell of it.

Besides, being polite to people you don't really care about is good practice.

Lene is exactly right. You need to dial back your aggressiveness. You might ask, well, why don't they dial back their rudeness? You're right, they should, but the only person you get to change is yourself.

I feel you on this one; people seem to be allowed to behave like jerks, but if you retaliate a little suddenly *you're* the bad guy, and don't even understand why. Turnabout is fair play after all.... Doesn't work like that though, and to be honest I'm not sure why either. I just know its easier to be diplomatic and nonagressive and compliant, just don't let others walk all over you.