unintentional cues

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Joined: 13 Nov 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 15
Location: Takoma Park, MD

23 Nov 2005, 4:37 pm

Has anyone here ever made anyone think you were mad at them, and you had no idea you did anything to make them think that? Today at work someone apologized to me for making me mad at her, and I wasn't at all mad at her. I was having a bad day, but I don't think I showed it too much(I've gotten very good at hiding my emotions), and she was the only one who said anything. I didn't ask her what I did exactly, but now I know I'll have to be extra nice to her, even though I'm not the "nice" and friendly type. Has that ever happened to anyone else, and did you work it out?

quietangel
Deinonychus

Joined: 8 Nov 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 362
Location: Maryland

23 Nov 2005, 5:25 pm

I know what you mean!
People have told me that I look pissed off all the time. Or they say stuff (wize cracks that really do piss me off) like (youve been off for two days you shouldn't look like that, etc. )
An acquaintence of mine told me that it was because I always have my brows together.
I think it is because I am always thinking and looking down when I walk.

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neongrl
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Joined: 5 Oct 2005
Age: 48
Gender: Female
Posts: 704
Location: Delhi, Ontario, Canada

23 Nov 2005, 5:44 pm

That sort of thing happens to me too often. It seems that my body language rarely matches what I'm really thinking or feeling inwardly. Just another normal part of being autistic. I don't know how many times I've told my husband "Don't believe what you see on the outside." I think he's finally starting to catch on, but he's only one person...

animallover
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Joined: 22 Jun 2004
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Posts: 759

23 Nov 2005, 5:58 pm

I have the same problem - people will think that I'm mad when I'm not or what I'm saying won't match what I'm thinking . . . I think it is just part of AS
What I do is when I'm with one of the few people who I trust I listen to how they respond to me to see how I appear to look or what my voice sounds like to them . . .

hale_bopp
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Joined: 2 Nov 2004
Gender: Female
Posts: 17,054
Location: None

23 Nov 2005, 6:07 pm

I sometimes make people think i'm mad at them, but I don't really try to. I'm kinda aware that my behaviour comes across that way, but half the time the person has done something to annoy me anyway.

Faraquet
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 3 Dec 2004
Gender: Male
Posts: 38
Location: Portland OR. USA

23 Nov 2005, 6:29 pm

My friend Tim is always saying things like "looks like Alex is having a bad day today", and then I just have to shake my head and say "nope." I think it has to do with the look of intense thinking.

larsenjw92286
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