I have become a brat , and want to change.

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Like the title said I have become a brat and want to change.

I have been being a bit menipulative to my boyfriend lately and getting upset when he is away.
I never used to get angry at anyone ever, but lately I have.

He has done nothing wrong and he is really upset about other stuff thats going on in his life. I want to help him with it but every time he startes talking about it I start ranting about MY problems.

I have become so self centered.


My family has 2 dogs and they are both scared of thunder storms and they need me to comfort them . But lately I havent been wanting to ,I feel to stressed or I say its not only my responsibility.

And one dog sleeps in my room at night and sometimes she wants out to go to the bathroom, and I just let her go in the living room cause I cant be bothered to take her all the way out.

I havent been cleaning the house like I should eather.

I have been trying to change but then I start doing it all over again.

I am becoming really disfuncanal. I need help but I dont know what to do.

Any sugestions?

Yeah if you want to change then change. Awareness is step one. Then if it irritates you that's step two. So now that you are aware you then become irritated. Step three is simply and evolution of that so it becomes worse, more anxiety based and stuff, and then eventually you have to figure it out. A stop. Or B keep it up and feel badly ... it's like a guilt thing.

Another idea is to use rubber bands and then you snap them ... use two for best effect. So when you do a bad habit then you snap ... negative reinforcement.

Other than that you have to learn to understand your own body ... so for me I look deep in side until I am happy with the answer ... so if a dog bothers me I say ... why does it bother me ... then as I look deeper I come to the conclusion I hate chiwah wahs because they are rats and in the true animal kingdom feed my family for a day ... but yeah ... its like that.

Everybody goes through periods like this, it is okay because you have recognised yourself that it isn't good. Since you have recognised whats up, thats a start.
I get whiny at my boyfriend sometimes, and sometimes I can forget to feed my guinea pigs especially if I am wrapped up in a special interest, and I also do not walk my dog every day and I know I should because he depends on me, same as the guinea pigs.
I'm sure its a phase you're having and it doesnt make you a bad person.

It has happened to me, too. There are very sensitive individuals on AFF who incidentally love to debate or more accurately flame. I have suggested what I have learned from my graduate school class in Applied Social Psych about hostile aggression spirals, conflict management, and hostile attribution bias, and that it might be more effective and productive to write like a moderator than like a child.

My brother and friend and I were at a party once somewhere near Oxon Hill, MD. The friend and I are Aspie but don't set the friend off. The NTs had to ask the friend to debate outdoors if he had to.

Think of the board as a party, not a debate.

But I do get angry and I do want to shoot back. "Crisco kid, fat in the can? Did you plagarize One Fat Summer by Robert Lipsyte too?"

It is because I have an abusive father. They say this is how the cycle continues. I want to stop it here and now.

I have been researching on what causes manipulative behavior. I found out it is caused by low self asteem (in a nut shell) .

I am going to try and ask direct questions and be upfront and honest with the people I am around.
If they don't give me the answer I want that is fine because I cannot control another person's actions.

Also when I get back form my vacation I NEED to go back to abuse counceling, because they will be able to help me figure out how to stop my negative behaviour.

Yes my father abused me in the past but that is NO excuse for me to be acting this way and I want to change , and I will try my very best.