A so-called "friend," ignoring me.

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I know a girl who is in the military and she claims to herself to be a friend. In fact, we did things together all the time before she left for vocational school and the military. However, when she got out of Vocational school, she started calling me on the phone to talk but never wanted to do anything and always made up excuses.

In fact, she graduated last year and joined the ARMY. In addition, she even blew me off when it came to taking her to dinner before she left for boot camp, claiming that she was working with a personal trainer all weekend. In addition, I have confronted this girl on her games and she ends up yelling at me tell me she doesn't appreciate what I did.

Anyway, that's not important, as this girl has been in the ARMY a year and has been in Iraq for about 4 months. However, is back in the US on leave with her family and has promised me that she is going to call and get together with me. Unfortunately, it's been over a week and she hasn't bothered to contact me and even tell me how she is doing.

In response, I wrote her an e-mail telling her that I think we are going different directions and I wished her the best of luck.

Did I do the right choice?

I am going through a similar situation with a friend of mine.

I sometime think that many NT people who befriend auties and aspies do so for what they can get out of us. I have one "friend" who is never around except when he wants money.
I do have a coupl (a doctor and his wife) who are truly my friends but I think they may be kind of on the aspie side.

it sounds like she could be trying subtly to distance herself for whatever reason, but then if she'd told her family that, i doubt they'd promise you that this was not the case. it occurs to me that she might have been damaged from some experiences in the army, as many people are so i've heard.

A user type of friend is not exclusive to Auties, just so you know. People will do what you allow. A friend is a friend when there is give and take. If there is only take it's not a friendship. It happens alot to people who are just really good and generous too. My husband is one of those, and when we got together we did clean out his "user" friends who would be around him as long as he repaired their stuff. As soon as he became busy with a job, or me, however, off they went. It was hard to learn that, but he has and is now surrounded by people who truly are friends.

It's the same kin of thing if you abuse drugs. Suddenly the drug friends are everywhere, and when you stop, they go where the drugs are...it was never about you or friendships.

There are really good decent people in the world too. The ones who aren't just seem really easy to find.

Thanks guys,
I feel a lot better after having a talk about this girl. I am more shocked as I thought she was my friend but wasn't one to begin with. Infact, I don't think she's faithful.

Yeah sometimes my friends do that too, not that i don't do it ( there are some annoying people out there...) , usually them putting me off is all in my head...

she may have simply lost interest in you and doesn't want to tell you that. i'd say you did the right thing, it's just going to keep on going if you keep trying. in a few years she might want to get back together because she hasn't seen you or talked to you in a while, but it might end up being the same thing. there's no point continuing right now because she doesn't seem interested in hanging out at the moment, if someone wants to hang out, they will make time for you sometime, they don't blow you off repeatedly.