Making changes in your life

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I have read a number of books written by professionals describing Asperger Syndrome. Many authors leave me whith the impression that AS is a permanent condition that not can be helped, that spouses must curbe their own needs to be able to live in a relationship whith a person with AS, that this person must be protected from sensory overload and is unable to function socially. My experience is that my AS diagnosis is much more dynamic and able to change. I am not living in a relationship at present, but I am aware that I must adapt my needs to be able to live in one. I have educated myself in AS by reading biographies, autobiographies and literature on psycology. I have been to several talks and conferences on the subject. Throughout my selfeducation I have had a mentor with whom I have discussed my progress and gained support from in the process. I have learned to handle sensory overload by controlled exposures to enviroments that I think of as stressfull. I limit the hours I am exposed and when I leave I tell my friends that i am tired. I have from the onset been open about my difficulties so they know I am just looking out for myself. And every hour I stay and enjoy myself is a succes and I find I am able to push my limits. I have greatly improved my social abilities by reading, observing and trying out social situations. The key to my succes is how I set my ambitions and how I handle setbacks. I take things one step at a time and I keep a postive attitude. Whith people I know well, smalltalk is relatively easy. Whith people I don´t know as well I take cues from as to witch subject we are talking about. And I use my experiences to compensate for my inabilities. And again is my mentor a good support.
So I have learned that I can handle sensory overload and stress and improve my social skills through hard and determined training. And it is possible to change even when given an AS diagnosis.

I'm happy to read you've found success in pushing yourself past your limitations. Limitations are fluid like that. The only prison is the one we create for ourselves and when we throw away the key, then we start to believe the people that want us to think a certain way.

I come from a different angle-- of not knowing why I had difficulties. I've always pushed myself far beyond my limitations-- your post gives me inspiration to continue to do so.

I think it's great for anyone who wants to make changes and does the work and research to help them into these changes. Congratulations.


I've only discovered what AS was about 6 months ago. Now I've been thinking back on my entire life and seeing how this effected me and what my reactions were to particular situations. Now everything makes sense!

I noticed that good major changes in my life were often helped along with a person I refer to as a beneficial "catalyst". These are people who gave me self confidence to try new things.

In many cases, my catalysts was only in my life briefly (the shortest time was a cancer survivor who spoke to me for an hour, and then there are a few people who were in my life for a few years; and my husband is my longtime catalyst and hopefully this will last our lifetimes), but the impact that they made is indelible.


I feel like I've drawn people into my life when I was ready and had something to learn from them, and hope the relationship, however brief or long is/was mutually beneficial.



There's a book I read many years ago - Richard Bach's "Illusions". One quote stays with me:
"Argue your limitations, and their yours".