How do they hate thee? Let me count the ways.
If this is the kind of "intervention" everyone has been talking about, it's doing more harm than good.
When you do something good, it counts. When I do something good, it doesn't count because... oh, who cares -- make up any excuse, it doesn't have to make sense.
When you do something bad, it doesn't count because you are you. When I do something bad, it always counts double, because I am me.
When I do something good that you can't do, it counts against me because it made you feel bad.
When you do something bad to me, it's a good point for you because it makes you feel good.
I found a perfect example in Tony Attwood's "Complete Guide to Alperger's Syndrome," chapter 4, page 104.
The story is about Eric (victim), Steven (perp who ended up with a bloody nose) and a substitute teacher. The shrink reviews the incident and helps Eric to assign "blocks" to show how the actions of each person contributed to the conflict. With the shrink's help, Eric was able to play down Steven's actions, play up his own, and gave very little responsibility to the conveniently deaf sub. No blocks at all were assigned to the regular teacher who allowed what was obviously an on-going problem, or to the lying, manipulative shrink who tricked Eric into believing that he was more at fault than he was.
So, the moral of the story is that violence pays. You get a day off from school, and thereafter everyone is aware and has to do something about the perp, even though they won't admit it.
16 Jan 2009, 2:24 pm
