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slurr
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04 Mar 2009, 4:17 am

it is the most paralizing, depressing feeling i have ever experienced. i would trade absolutely anything for friends, hell, i would even take on cancer if in turn i wouldnt feel alone and rejected all the time.
friends are the people who provide meaning for your life. without them, you may as well jump off some bridge, and no one ask where you went, no one calls to check up where you've been.
Nothing f***s with your self esteem and self worth more. Humans are social beings, without social interaction we're like a wild animal which doesn't get to run in the wild. Its just not natural.
i just dont understand. i'm good looking, i'm intelligent above average, i have good sense of humour, i am virtuous, friendly, enjoy pretty much the same things other people do, i have good taste, good analytical and verbal skills, in short, there is nothing that makes me stand out as someone you wouldnt want to hang out with. in fact, quite the opposite is the case.
yet still, i'm always alone. WHY???
i'm i really, really dont like my lot.



Jsmitheh
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04 Mar 2009, 6:51 am

slurr wrote:
i'm good looking, i'm intelligent above average, i have good sense of humour, i am virtuous, friendly, enjoy pretty much the same things other people do, i have good taste, good analytical and verbal skills, in short, there is nothing that makes me stand out as someone you wouldnt want to hang out with. in fact, quite the opposite is the case.
yet still, i'm always alone. WHY???
i'm i really, really dont like my lot.


I'm ugly, not intelligent, have zero sense of humor, don't even know what virtuous means, I am probably friendly, but how would I know? All I enjoy is wasting time on my computer. I don't know what you mean by taste or analytical skills, and i have terrible verbal skills. I talk in a monotone voice and stutter, stammer, and a sentence that should take 5 seconds, I take 20 seconds to get out. I have no friends either. Weird, huh.



Learning2Survive
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04 Mar 2009, 11:01 am

slurr wrote:
it is the most paralizing, depressing feeling i have ever experienced. i would trade absolutely anything for friends, hell, i would even take on cancer if in turn i wouldnt feel alone and rejected all the time.
friends are the people who provide meaning for your life. without them, you may as well jump off some bridge, and no one ask where you went, no one calls to check up where you've been.
Nothing f**** with your self esteem and self worth more. Humans are social beings, without social interaction we're like a wild animal which doesn't get to run in the wild. Its just not natural.
i just dont understand. i'm good looking, i'm intelligent above average, i have good sense of humour, i am virtuous, friendly, enjoy pretty much the same things other people do, i have good taste, good analytical and verbal skills, in short, there is nothing that makes me stand out as someone you wouldnt want to hang out with. in fact, quite the opposite is the case.
yet still, i'm always alone. WHY???
i'm i really, really dont like my lot.


hi there
dude, feel free to PM me. i've got some time on my hands due to having a few days of from college and work. let's talk about stuff - you sound like a smart dude. i've got 5 people in my contact list - Strapples is one of them. they are all fun to chat with. so feel free to pm me. say what you do for school/work/fun yada yada yada.

all the best

jeff



hal9000
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04 Mar 2009, 11:37 am

Some of us have been here, done that. We have come to realize that yes, it would be nice to have friends, but our experience has taught us that most people are conniving, selfish and mean. If you've spent a long time in the workforce expect to have this understanding accelerated. I was speaking to my boss and she told me that her daughter was once invited to a wedding for the sole purpose of setting her up with one of the brides family. Something as innocuous and pleasant as a wedding invite, someone had an agenda. This girl wasn't interested in the guy, needless to say she was no longer invited to any of this family's gahterings...



Learning2Survive
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04 Mar 2009, 11:51 am

hal9000 wrote:
Some of us have been here, done that. We have come to realize that yes, it would be nice to have friends, but our experience has taught us that most people are conniving, selfish and mean. If you've spent a long time in the workforce expect to have this understanding accelerated. I was speaking to my boss and she told me that her daughter was once invited to a wedding for the sole purpose of setting her up with one of the brides family. Something as innocuous and pleasant as a wedding invite, someone had an agenda. This girl wasn't interested in the guy, needless to say she was no longer invited to any of this family's gahterings...


but common it can be fun to hang out with someone who shares your interests? two selfish people can have fun together, can't they?



LivingOutsideTheBox
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04 Mar 2009, 1:58 pm

It's a simple fact that all of our behaviour has to have a CAUSE...
We have to have a reason to start a train of thought toward...ANYTHING..
Including including other people(No, that sentence is just fine the way it is)

We're all basically selfish beings, even selfless acts have causes that start from within.

So that's a moot point.

Agenda's that cause harm to the target of your behaviour, should be blocked by someone's own sense of decency...
Most people do that half the time. They're fine by me.
It's the people that constantly scheme that ya gotta watch out for.

Not the average randomperson.

That being said, If ya want, IM me, and I may as well give ya my e-mail.
I'm not lonely by a long shot, but that's cuz I HAPPENED to hone my social skills throughout my teens,

......And still I find "people", the big "?" once you go past their outer shell,
an annoyance at best, my worst fears at..worst.

Take yer time. Most aspies&auties I know tend to be the best friends possible.
.....Quite simply because they give an honest, original, lovely blunt answer.
The people who like that are who you should befriend.

The people who don't...here's yer 70-foot-Pole TM



phil777
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04 Mar 2009, 10:44 pm

Erf, i've been lonely for a good amount of years =.= the only thing i have are acquaintances, not exactly "friends" (the kind of friend that cares about you, comes to see you, n whatnot). I can remember not having anyone come to my birthday parties ever since i was approximately 7 or so (being 22, that's a lot of them) and spending them with my family (and even then my brother and sister aren't always available..). Meh, at some point, i suppose you stop caring, i don't mind having friends (i might actually have trouble keeping them... but i'm doing efforts towards that direction by writing them emails sometimes...).



hal9000
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05 Mar 2009, 1:16 am

I can't seem to keep the friends I got, I am drifting apart from a good friend whom I have known for five years. I think this happens with a lot of people, though.



Learning2Survive
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05 Mar 2009, 1:23 am

phil and hal, yep and yep - that's the story of my life.



Homer_Bob
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06 Mar 2009, 2:24 pm

I can relate in a way. I don't have much friends either. I do have a big family who cares about me so I'm not alone. However, I still wish I had friends. Whether you are good looking or not, looks don't give you friends; your social skills do. The fact is, if you can't socialize normally, you can't make friends. I can't socialize normal either which is why I don't have much friends. I have some acquaintances who claim they like me but are they my friends; I don't know!! ! I don't have the guts to ask for something more. I don't want to embarrass myself in case I'm wrong. I just cannot face that scene. My brain cannot detect social skills that the majority have for granted. Overall, we simply can't understand what NT's know naturally, socializing. We are born without something the majority of the people have. That's the way it is.



Greentea
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07 Mar 2009, 8:07 am

I learned here on these forums, from people wiser than me, how to live a happy life without friends. I don't even remember such a thing exists anymore, and ever since I don't waste my time and energy trying for people to like me a bit, I've regained my dignity too.


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grizeldatee
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07 Mar 2009, 9:38 am

In younger years I was lonely most of the time. I did some pretty foolish things attempting to have friends. It does get better as you get older, and you will probably find a couple of true friends along the way if you are true to yourself. I had no true friends when I was putting on a show trying to have friends.


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DustinWX
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07 Mar 2009, 11:27 am

If it makes you feel better, I've never been kissed at 19, and girls laugh at me most of the time.



sketch
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07 Mar 2009, 11:52 am

i don't have many friends, actually i'd say theres only about 2 constant ones, noones ever been there through everything like those people who talk about having friends from when they've been in preschool and all that, i've never had that.

i mean i had some friends for years, but they've moved on now, me not having a job, not having a car all that seems to have interfeared and yeah so lately i've felt very alone in life.



protest_the_hero
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08 Mar 2009, 11:27 pm

DustinWX wrote:
If it makes you feel better, I've never been kissed at 19, and girls laugh at me most of the time.
That makes me feel better about myself.



serpienteazul
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14 Mar 2009, 7:09 pm

hey everyone
i'm from mexico and if you didn't know
this country is known for having warm, friendly people
and me being like this it's like i'm in the wrong country :P

but i learned to see the good things in life and
i think that we have something that most people don't have
and that's that we can be the best at what we do and it's so easy
so then i don't think i'm in the wrong planet

i think every thing in this life has a porpuse
we just need to find out what is it

and i can tell you from my experience that tv and all these un-natural things
don't help much
being in nature allows finding your self and living a happy life :)