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autisticstar
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17 Apr 2009, 2:12 pm

I have a very good friend who has Asperger's. I have been dating a wonderful guy for a little over a year now. I realized at one point that I had gotten so focused on my relationship with my boyfriend that I was spending less time with my friends. So I sought to correct the situation by spending more time with my girl friends.

I had made plans to spend some time with her this weekend; originally we were going to go on a double date. However, the guy said that he had to work as he found a new job. The guy is an Aspie too so I know he is telling the truth. So I offered to invite a few other friends along so it would not just be me, my boyfriend, and her. She decided that it wasn't a good idea since she is upset that the other guy couldn't go.

My friend is very disappointed that things haven't gone the way she would have liked them to with this guy. She has invited him to several different things and he has been turning her down a lot lately. I like to get together with a few friends along with my boyfriend sometimes. I don't care if my friends don't have a date but many times people feel uncomfortable going out with a couple. I want my friend to feel included but she says it's too uncomfortable to go out with just me and my boyfriend.

I am in my late thirties and she is 27. I don't know any guys in her age range to introduce her to. What can I do to make my friend understand that she is still very important to me and that I would never cut her out of my life?



Eller
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17 Apr 2009, 3:55 pm

autisticstar wrote:
The guy is an Aspie too so I know he is telling the truth.


Huh? It's not like Aspies are always telling the truth. Many of us manage "white lies" and that sort of thing.



MONKEY
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17 Apr 2009, 4:16 pm

Eller wrote:
autisticstar wrote:
The guy is an Aspie too so I know he is telling the truth.


Huh? It's not like Aspies are always telling the truth. Many of us manage "white lies" and that sort of thing.


I know yeah talk about generalization. I tell lots of white lies


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TheSpecialKid
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17 Apr 2009, 5:00 pm

MONKEY wrote:
Eller wrote:
autisticstar wrote:
The guy is an Aspie too so I know he is telling the truth.


Huh? It's not like Aspies are always telling the truth. Many of us manage "white lies" and that sort of thing.


I know yeah talk about generalization. I tell lots of white lies


I don't think she was trying to generalize. It's probably just a "fast write, didn't think"-situation.
I know that I sometimes do this.

Now I would try to correct the sentence, and you may correct me if I'm wrong (Well of course you may :D ):

"The guy is an Aspie too and is therefore not good at lying, so I know he is telling the truth."



Strangegem
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17 Apr 2009, 5:30 pm

why not just go out with her without the boyfriend? like a girls night out or something. I just didn't see that option in the paragraph for some reason, so I thought I'd suggest it. I'm sure he's lovely (I'm addicted to my own bf), but you may not want to include him if it makes her uncomfortable to hang out with you as a couple.


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