Obsession with my best friend

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I hear lots about people being obsessed with love interests but I'm just curious to know if there's anyone here that has been obsessed with someone as no more than a friend.

I have been friends with someone for 4 years now and we have grown very close - we have quite a few interests in common and also both have problems with depression and social anxiety, etc. and I just find it really easy to connect with him. The thing is that he seems to be in my thoughts a lot of the time - it's NEVER in a sexual or a romantic way, or as in the kind of "daydreamy" thoughts I've had in the past when I've been infatuated with people, and I have no desire to be anything more than friends (especially as I'm in a relationship with someone else already).

I just spend quite a lot of time thinking about things to talk about with him or things I've been doing that I can tell him, which I think perhaps stems from a fear that if I don't then I will run out of things to say or my mind will blank out when he asks me a question. I think also sometimes I think in a way I see him as a role model and want to be like him, as he is quite a bit more confident than me and goes out a lot and think people respect him a lot more than they respect me for various reasons.

I am scared that my friendship is an obsession and that eventually my obsessiveness will disappear and thus so will the friendship. It's by far the longest I've ever been just friends with anyone and have nothing to compare this to, so I don't understand if this is a normal part of friendship or if it is really wrong for me to be like this, or if I should be worried. Is this something anyone else on here has ever experienced?

I think this is common for aspies. We get excited about something that makes life seem more normal.

4 years is pretty long term (for me at least, lol). It would seem that he enjoys your company, so I would just try to relax a little. lol.. i know the feeling of making the ultimate deal breaker faux pax. you must remember, you are after all HUMAN and subject to ALL the consequences of that fact. Maybe occasionally honest expression of how much you appreciate someone's friendship does not ever hurt. Kindness usually mitigates lots of things. peace, zig

I have had a 20 year on again, off again obsessive friendship with my best friend from middle school. I don't quite understand it, because I have had other fulfilling friendships, and have not been obsessed with the person. I have noticed that the friendships that I have not been obsessed with the person have been more mutual.

I still don't have quite a grasp on the earliest stages of the obsession, but I do know that later on, I admired him for pulling himself up by the bootstraps out of poverty and a bad homelife to become a somewaht successful person. I guess I always wanted to know what made him tick, and follow in his footsteps so to speak.

Another thing that didn't help matters was when I always tried to contact him, he either would get terse with me, or would tell me that we couldn't have a close friendship, to get out of his life, etc. But in spontaneous interaction, he was always decent to me, so the vibes that he let off led me to believe that friendship with him was an open door. I also noticed that I had a tendency to contact him when the obsession was on the high end of the cycle so to speak. I know for a fact that this led to his curtness with me.

What has been strange about this friendship is that about six months ago, he added me as a friend on Facebook. We have said little or nothing to one another, I am afraid to contact him, to avoid a dramatic conversation. What was even more wierd, is the fact that the obsession was on the low point of the cycle, I had moved on with my life to other things, so my cares (and obessesiveness) for him was less. I would like to tell him about all of the great things that have happened in my life, but am afraid of the terse conversation and rebuffing that would probably come from him.

Seems it happened to me too. Im pathetic now. Yes, she is like something that makes life seem more normal. To me. I cannot stop thinking of her. I always excited being with her. I want us to be best friends forever. For the rest of my life. She is expert in many things. She's a very caring people, excited and arrogant. She told me Im special to her and I her told her so too. It was 1 year and a half for us become roomate and now already separated but still friends in the way it is. But she already has a best friend of her. Known before she knew me. Im making best friend with someone who already has a best friend. I think it is not ok for it becoming like this. That will make her difficult. I should stop I know. Didnt I? A month now and it is still in my mind. I am not yet find a relationship with someone (boyfriend) so I hope this is not bothering my life towards special romance to the man in my forever will be life.

Heh, I have the same problem. There's this one friend who I really like and I missed her during winter break even though I don't generally miss people. Still I always like being around her and sometimes want to be alone with my friend. Its platonic, don't get me wrong, but I feel normal and accepted (even though I can pass as a neurotypical) around her because sometimes we can talk about complex things and sometimes I like seeing things from a different point of view. Now I'm wondering if its an obsession.

Hi. I think i'm okay now. It was really an obsession. Because they make us feel more calm then we will love to be around her. Because we never hv meet someone like dat before and we may thinking not able to meet someone like dat twice in life ever again. so we afraid to lose them. yeah, i like her because we can talk about everything and she understands that. and i am a complex minded myself. what i learnt is, she taught me how to love and how to claim. so i like this side of her. then after sometime i posted here, I began to make a research myself. thanks god i can clearly thinking now. We cannot be too obsessed with everything. life is long. we will meet many in life in other aspect too. and life is short too. we will die even. so no need to obsess to this little something. more important to focus on ourselves. on how to upgrade it. this is all just some part of my life play. but of course i will never forget my her and we will be best friends still. and communicate like before. just before, i was too obsessed. it really leave me deep impact. but thanks again it was only for short time. i wasnt stop thinking and now i can sort my mind.

I'm in the same boat as you guys.