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any tips on aquard running mouth?

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obnoxiously-me
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09 May 2009, 7:00 am

When I interact with people, especially people I feel don't like me, I get loud and very long winded. I know it's annoying to people, and it embarrasses me. Does anyone share this habit, and how do you deal with it?



dillan
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09 May 2009, 7:20 am

i have the same problem, and it actually is embarassing sometimes, but i cant help, because im there too
but you are definately not alone


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Zsazsa
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09 May 2009, 8:06 am

As Dale Carnegie stated in his famous book, " How To Win Friends and Influence People"... the best conversationist is a good
listener. Many times, in social situations, it is best to simply keep your mouth shut and your ears open.



elderwanda
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10 May 2009, 2:22 pm

I'm just curious why you interact with people who you think don't like you. Is it out of necessity, like at work, or something?

BTW, I don't mean this to be a judgment, or to say that you should not interact with them. I personally don't interact with people if I have the feeling they don't like me, but I'm not sure if that's the best thing or not, because I'm not taking risks or expanding my horizons either.

If I am in a situation where I have to interact with people who I think don't like me, I just answer their questions as quickly as I can and try to get away.



ASPowerations
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10 May 2009, 6:07 pm

I'd say the best thing to do is to practice being less verbose. even afterward, you can think to yourself "How could I have worded that differently?"


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obnoxiously-me
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10 May 2009, 10:06 pm

elderwanda wrote:
I'm just curious why you interact with people who you think don't like you. Is it out of necessity, like at work, or something?

BTW, I don't mean this to be a judgment, or to say that you should not interact with them. I personally don't interact with people if I have the feeling they don't like me, but I'm not sure if that's the best thing or not, because I'm not taking risks or expanding my horizons either.

If I am in a situation where I have to interact with people who I think don't like me, I just answer their questions as quickly as I can and try to get away.

It's these random meetings, at the grocery store or whatever. I notice things/people easily, and usually try to avoid these people. But if I'm with a friend I feel like I kinda have too talk to them.

I will try to just keep my mouth shut and not talk at all from now on. It's just very hard. It happens when I feel like people don't respect me at all, or whatever. And I know I'm making the situation worse, and feel like such a fool.



Dentu
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10 May 2009, 10:21 pm

Try asking questions about other topics every now and then, separate from whatever you're talking about. Nothing too obviously forced like "So how have you been?", try to get a feel for what the person likes to discuss and bring those sorts of things up. Or rewind to a part of the conversation they enjoyed more before you got off on a tangent.

They don't seem to like talking about jet engines? Well, they were enjoying the discussion on car engines before I got there, let's go back to that. Stuff like that.