Looking back on things negatively, burning bridges

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I am constantly looking back on things negatively...could it be that I'm too slow to realizing that I'm being hurt or offended by people until I'm out of that environment?

Why is it that I was always surpremely bitter and pissed off on my last days of high school and college instead of happy that I accomplished such goals? I put myself in situations where I hung out with people who were always yelling at me or putting me down or criticizing me. Perhaps they teased me while they're doing this so they confuse me with NT like humor that I am supposed to accept!

I'm always burning bridges with friends I felt weren't very nice to me at all or I feel hate me (cuz when you're an aspie dealing with certain NTs, it happens) blocking them or taking off my facebook friends, never speaking to them ever again. Hell I dont even speak to anyone anymore or even turn on my AIM. I just cant handle talking to friends and knowing that most of them hate me (if not for the person I am then...then for the person I am now for breaking off contact like this).

I go through so much hell without knowing what to do about it but I can never remind myself that it wasn't all hell. My internship at Disney World had its ups and downs but the downs came near the end of the internship when I was given a very terrible and high stressed new job during the final weeks. Certain aspects of it were not bad and enjoyable but that wasn't what I was thinking at all when I left. Same would go for high school and college. Good times were somewhere in the mix but they both ended on negative, sad, miserable notes. I can't help but look at it all as a nightmare.

Aspie-ish maybe? I doubt it but I dunno why I couldn't help any of it. All of this looking back on the bad and all the depression I suffered then and now...feeling nothing but hurt by others had caused me to develop an anti-social disorder or social anxiety...I now officially hate people!

This sounds like something that should be in The Haven, I know but I felt since it deals with social skills...I was wondering how much of this is relatable.

My opinion--I get a lot of the same negativity, but I've always attributed mine towards depression.
For me, high school felt like a waste of time and a joke, and as for college, I still need my diploma (incomplete on thesis). So leaving college, I felt like a failure.

Six months away from all my college "friends" and I've burnt bridges or lost contact with them. For some I didn't feel like I was that close to them, or I felt like a burden to them, or simply lost interest. End result, I really don't talk to anyone nowadays.

Personally, I am really hard on myself. I feel that I was unproductive in high school, so while I did not really despise it, I do look back at it in a negative light. College, I'm pretty apathetic about.

I think the "aspie'ish" adds to it, or is possibly a root cause of it, but when push comes to shove, I would attribute a lot of the negativity just to depression.

But yeah. I relate, with a good portion of it.

I have severe depression as well but when I think about it my AS traits was what caused the never ending depression to begin with. I believe that most depression is the result of bad incidents we go through instead of a chemical imbalance.

I had a very antisocial final semester (and summer of college) and it could be that going off of Celexa would've trigger something in me that was like anger + depression x 1000.

But these kind of things occur so much for me (regardless of whether or not I'm on antidepressants) that it almost seems inevitable and mentally/emotionally natural for me.

Same thing happens to me. Maybe you need to meet someone who's also Aspie.