Why
Would hugging a pillow help calm you? I've sometimes hugged objects after waking up from nightmares or otherwise being spooked in the middle of the night. Or maybe you could try the non-human-applied pressure the HFAs use, that's also known to work on animals and might even theoretically work on NTs if they ever wanted to use it.
And then there's the "relaxation response" that I've read about, the inverse of fight-or-flight, which can be brought on by doing something repetitive for a while (typically repeating a word, phrase, or prayer to yourself, though stimming could probably do the trick too, and I've been doing it lately by watching a spinning spiral decoration go 'round and 'round) and bringing yourself back to the repetitive focus gently if your thoughts drift. Your breathing will slow and your muscles will release tension.
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Right planet, wrong country: possibly PLI as a child, Dxed ADD as a teen, naturalized citizen of neurotypicality as an adult
And then there's the "relaxation response" that I've read about, the inverse of fight-or-flight, which can be brought on by doing something repetitive for a while (typically repeating a word, phrase, or prayer to yourself, though stimming could probably do the trick too, and I've been doing it lately by watching a spinning spiral decoration go 'round and 'round) and bringing yourself back to the repetitive focus gently if your thoughts drift. Your breathing will slow and your muscles will release tension.
This is one of those times where I need a hug for the warmth and human contact so i don't think the pillow will work..but I will try it in a bit.
About the relaxation response thing yes I accidently stumbled upon my own version of that, which is listening to certain songs with heavy fast beats. One good one seems to be "We Like To Party" by the Vengaboys. I find it very soothing.
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Quantum Mechanics -- the dreams stuff is made of
i'm glad your friend got the therapist to call you. i know it's tough seeing a new therapist, but i think it's great that you're going. it took me quite some time to make the appointment with the therapist i'm seeing right now, but i'm so glad i did.
i also can't do phone calls. i force myself if i absolutely have to, but it takes it out of me.
good luck.
april
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April Love - Author
"Gift of the Morning"
"Secrets of a City Bench"
The really crappy part is that my financial problems, which are a good chunk of my anxiety lately, are going to be worsened considerably by this. She doesn't take insurance...she'll give me monthly itemized invoices that I can file with my PPOM but I'm terrible about following through with things like that, especially if it requires using the phone or in some other way dealing with a live person.
It's just all so overwhelming, even BEFORE i set up the appointment. This is one of those times i desperatley hate being alone because I could really use a real hug to calm me down.
Wow, sounds just like me. Well what you wrote about the $$, and not being to a gp in forever. I find I have a very difficult time taking care of myself too.
I can offer some advice about the therapist though. Earlier this year I just started telling her EVERYTHING. You'd be surprised- I think if you just start talking about how you feel, how you perceive the world, how you don't function...be honest now, it's the key- if you do this it'll work.
By this I mean: Go in there and bi*ch your ass off. Tell them how hard it is to do things, how it feels when... (insert personal thing here). Tell them about people. BE HONEST like never before. Tell all. I'm emphasizing this for a reason.
It's your only chance to do this in a situation where it is accepted, and not have to deal with the recipient on a personal (friend, gf, etc) basis. Once I made this decision several months ago it's helped SO much. The day I went in there feeling like "f it, I give up, I don't care, I'm not even going to try anymore, here it is lady, the godforsaken miserable truth" turned out to be the best day in therapy ever. I opened my mouth and a flood came out. I told her about a single day in my life. A generic day, from the heart.
She was shocked, stunned. This was after several months of therapy, where we'd get somewhere, and she was definately thinking of the ADD, wondering about the AS, but not really sure about anything... not buying it. She was still looking for an excuse to call me a lazy bum. I blew her away. She's now totally on my side and is actively helping me with the psychiatrist and other docs. Sometimes we make important phone calls in session because I can't.
It may depend on the therapist, but this is my new policy. Just tell them everything. Tell them you got stoned. Tell them why. Tell them how you feel about smoking pot. Do you wish you could stop? Have you tried? Do you stop, then come back to it? Tell them these things. I did. I told them how I felt, how my mind started speeding up when I quit smoking. Among other things I told them "really, after I quit smoking pot it feels great for a week. Then I go a little faster... then a little faster... then a little faster... and by the end of the month I was gone, my mind blazing along with no hope of catching up to it. I said if I could get high once or twice a week that would be perfect. But because of my addictive personality I can't do that and I smoke too much. Thinking faster than I think, I know it doesn't make sense but it's how it goes... anyway of course they say, well sure those are withdrawal symptoms, etc, etc. I go, well, doc, I can stop whenever I want to (haha classic addiction line) but then I'd back it up. I do stop smoking all the time. I can go years, months without. Not a problem- but my mind is going too fast. Toooo fast faster faster faster zipping right along whole conversations go by in a blink...
Haha, didn't mean to go on about that subject, cough, but it's true...
I stand by the honesty. Tell them all and maybe, you'll get some understanding out of them. I've been where you are and it sucks. It sucks a lot. I'm glad you responded a little more, are still here. The above strategy may not work for everyone, but it did me. Good luck man.
About the relaxation response thing yes I accidently stumbled upon my own version of that, which is listening to certain songs with heavy fast beats. One good one seems to be "We Like To Party" by the Vengaboys. I find it very soothing.
I love that song! And I find it quite relaxing as well. Jimi Hendricks also does it for me. Just a couple of songs and I'm comatose.
A deep pressure thing I used to do was to sleep between the mattress and box springs.
CockneyRebel
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Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 116,853
Location: In my little Olympic World of peace and love
Just got back from my first therapist appointment. She's really cool and surprisingly easy for me to talk to. I found I had a lot less trouble opening up than I thought I would.
Since this was my first appointment we basically just talked to get a general overview of my life and a little of my history (she says it'll take a second session to complete my intake.) Job history, friends, family, etc. Usual stuff I assume. Told her about my worsening anxiety and panic attacks at work due to overload; she suggested perhaps referring me to a psychiatrist about anti-anxiety meds. I told her I was open to the idea but that I was just a bit untrusting of that sort of thing.
At the end of my session, as I was leaving, I decided to mention to her that I had been researching my problems and that I was spending time hanging out on this forum (well I didn't tell her what site, just that I found a lot of kindred spirits on "a web site for people with asperger's and autism".) She said that she didn't think I was autistic but that asperger's definitely popped into her mind as a possibility when she was talking to me. She said it might be good to go to the psychiatrist so I can at least get tested. I told her I'd do it but she's have to help me out because I didn't think I could make more phone calls, and she said she'd set it up for me.
So I think it went well all in all. I actually feel better just finally having someone I can talk to who listens and doesn't judge anything I'm saying. We already scheduled my next two appointments; one next week and one the week after. I think I'm actually looking forward to the next appointment.
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Quantum Mechanics -- the dreams stuff is made of