Valentine's Day Blues

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I just did a bit of research, and apparently humans are classified as a quasi-monogamous or mildly polygynous species that evolved from a highly polygynous species. If you'd like more information, take a look at the end of this article, starting at the bottom of page 7:

http://www.nd.edu/~acasad/papers/WARR_11B_2.pdf

Perhaps my own desire for a purely monogamous relationship is natural but falls on a spectrum of desires that is reasonable for humans, ranging from overt promiscuity to complete fidelity. I am aware that many people (and particularly men) in our society tend to be naturally promiscuous. However, I honestly do not have the desire to mate outside the context of a monogamous relationship.

I suppose it is possible that this is a cognitive phenomenon, but it seems like a very base desire rather than a result of extensive reasoning. After all, through reasoning, I could readily conclude that it is to my benefit to impregnate as many women as possible in order to produce a greater number of viable offspring. Of course, alternatively, I could also conclude that it is to my detriment to reproduce at all due to the extreme economic penalty that is attached to raising a child in our society.

I am fairly certain that this is a natural desire rather than the result of deliberate thought. Cultural influence isn't much of an issue with me, as I only tend to adhere to cultural norms when rejecting them results in punishment.

I won't pretend to know how your brain works, but many human feelings that we think are natural are actually caused purely by culture. I believe I have elsewhere mentioned the fear of wolves...

Even I must admit that if I ever got a real girlfriend, I wouldn't make much of an attempt to get a second.

“Bothering to care” wasn’t exactly a choice…

When someone you love and trust admits to being unfaithful, it is going to hurt whether you want it to or not. Not only is the offending act hurtful, but also the element of trust between two people is broken. In many cases, that trust may never be regained.

I can't imagine anyone, no matter how unemotional and detached, who could simply choose not to be hurt by such a confession.

Because people don't like being cheated on? Even NT's?

It seems to me you're more highly autisic than the majority of people here.

Hope that all you who find Valentine's day hard haven't had too bad a day. And that at least one thing made you smile a little

its not like its this huge tradition of celebrating valentines here, (norway i mean) but i certainly notice it, coz of all the ads on tv and in the papers with stuff ppl can buy for their special someones. i cant say ive had a boyfriend/relationship, allthough i would really like too, i just need to find someone nice first.
i voted for: "...Will you be my valentine, Jay? I find bitterness quite attractive" but if no-one will be my valentine i will vote for the other option: "I dislike Valentine's Day"
just because it makes me feel sad that no one would and that makes me hate the holiday.. did that make any sense at all?

I care about Valentine's Day because I have a lot of platonic relationships.

BTW, I had a very good day today.

Ooohh...Wolves...Heck, all you have to do is bite the alpha male and then you take over the tribe. Problem solved. Fear gone. Just brush soon afterward and spit the hair out when they are not looking.

I now have another reason to dislike this holiday. I may have just lost my one friend today. Though as bad as it is I actually had a good laugh (though very sarcastic and dry) about it. I had forgotten that it was valentines day until reading this post today and noticed the irony. I lost my best friend on love day. I realized Im not loved.

Hello All,

It's a bit late to be posting...but I was busy doing college work and classes on Valentine's Day ironically.

Generally, I don't like Valentine's Day because of all the commercial aspects of it - ads for necklaces, jewelry, clothing, (insert something here), etc.

However my dear mother, who always comes up w/ pearls of wisdom at these low moments, told me that she doesn't see it as a negative thing to have the commercialism of it.

She justifies this by saying, "If it makes it so that men (such as Harley-Davidson bikers, punks, and other men who wouldn't normally do so) go out and get roses, other flowers, or other "nice" things for their loved ones, then she says "Bring it on!"

I personally get a little lonely on Valentine's Day - as I (as posted by JayShaw, others) am born with that desire to have a relationship with another human being, although for emotional/intellectual reasons as much as the sexual reasons), but there are a few things that help:

1) My dog and my cat both shower me with love and affection almost every day and night - although waking up to dog breath at 3 AM in the morning is not always convenient - and usually help me get through the day.
2) My mom - as mentioned above is a lifeline for me and also gives me hugs every single day and we always tell each other how much we love each other.
3) Dairy Queen opens on Valentine's Day, which means I can start treating myself to cherry malts and bringing the dog along for her dog cone.
4) College with all its stresses and requirements always keeps me distracted enough that I don't care as much or feel the desire to have a girlfriend as strongly as usual, and am able to cope much better that way.

I agree with the other posters who said that we should treat everyday like Valentine's Day with those who we truly love, but I like anyday that celebrates love and brings the world a little closer to peace...my ultimate goal!!

Well, hope this offers insight to somebody.

mentalman

I HATE Valentines day. It is a day for couples to rub the single's nose in it. I burned a CD that day with all kinds of hate music

J Geils Band- Love Stinks
Three Days Grace- I Hate Everything About You
Marilyn Manson- Disposable Teens
And So On...

At least it's only once a year.

Yeah, Dan, but why every year.

I passionately hate Valentines day, even though on a sensory level I really like the pretty red hearts and stare at them endlessly. My husband and I don't go in for that garbage, never did. I don't want any stinkin' flowers or chocolates. I want to be appreciated and loved every day.

When I was alone, I was horribly angry and bitter about V-Day, but now I just hate it more objectively! I feel like I should crusade against it, now that I'm happily married, for all the folks who are still trying to find mates.

Ban the day, Jay! Devil may care!! !

-Eva

its a little worst for me on Valentines day but but i just try to treat it as any other day
A