How would you describe your relationship with your parents?

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I feel lucky in so many ways. I actually remember being a happy child most of the time.

My problems listening, literal thinking, stubbornness, DSI and socializing didn't become 'problems' until I was in school. I had a few friends who accepted me to some degree, but they often played "Stump The Genious", asking questions about wierd stuff, to laugh about how smart I was about almost anything. That was very hurtful when I finally figured it out, and my parents became my only friends, except for many fair weather types that would come and go. I was in my 20s before I was finally able to make some friends.

My parents were very supportive of me and gave me their strengths as best they could. My dad taught me to play guitar at first and music became my obsession for many years. My mom taught me a love of gardening as a child, and that has been more of a life long quest and pleasure than anything else I can think of. I had my daytime and night time obsessions, right there and both are harmless, even spiritual and emotionally satisfying at times.

I have a lot to be thankful for, but I know my story is not typical. I really don't want to start a negativity thread, so if anyone can add some things that are positive about their parents relationship with them I think we could all enjoy it. It might also give us parents of autistic children some different guidelines from a "child's perspective".

Last edited by DirtDawg on 08 Aug 2006, 12:04 am, edited 1 time in total.

Relationship with parents is bad my dad is an alcoholic a$$hole and my mom is
an pathological liar(she will lie over simple things in any conversation).

My parents are co-dependant.

My dad is a bit too much of a "Nice guy" (the enabler) I also suspect he's an Aspie.

My mom is a self-destructive fool. I think she's a cross between a Somatic Narcissist and Borderline personality disorder. Not to mention a hypocondriac to the point of Munchausens disease.

I have a good relationship with my parents.

Mom died on Mother’s day in 1993 of advanced diabetes. She was 62. My father is alcoholic, and except for a brief phone conversation when my mother died, I haven’t spoken to him in nearly 20 years.

Dad aspie mom nt?
right?

brutal hinesty here.

My relationship with my Mum has been great, no complaints from me. Well, she does have a tendency to CLEAN. Apparently I'm too messy for her and it stresses her out, so she has to clean my living areas

Dad and I have always been...problematic.

That sounds somewhat like my own situation.

My dad is absolutely awesome. He lets too much go, and doesn't speak his mind nearly enough.

But then, when my mom is on a never ending power trip and stonewalls everything to the point that in the unlikely event you can actually win an argument it doesn't mean a thing? It might just be best to keep your mouth shut.

I don't really know what my Mom's problem is. I went over an article about Narcissists the other day, and much about it doesn't really fit. Nor does Asperger's. Might be something to Bipolar/Borderline.

They could both use serious therapy (I'd say I could stand some too, but I think I know my own problems. And my ideas for solutions seem too good to have threatened with bad science(TM) )

My parents are far from horrible people. They might be Neurotic, but they aren't vicious. I never got beaten or spanked (And I turned out to be a pretty good person. Unemployed, but then good people have a hard time getting those anyways )


Mixed messages/Psychotic behavoir aside, they where pretty great. I was always encouraged by them to ask questions. I know they always wanted what was best for me. They helped teach me some good values, which I adapted into better values the more I learned about how the world really works rather than how it should work. I wasn't allowed to play violent video games until I was older, then it was pretty much accepted that I could. Hence I am now a pacifist that plays extremely violent video games.

I have a great relationship with my dad, who is in many ways like me. That he works a pretty depressing job to support me and my mom makes me feel more than a little guilty, and is one of many reasons why I want to get rich and give him enough money that he can quit it. He should be working in computers. He wanted to when they were first apearing. He was told there was no future in it. What a load of garbage.

I wouldn't be suprised that if my dad did get involved in computers that we'd probably be much further along than we are today.

We end up seeing a lot of movies together, and make a lot of sarcastic remarks. (I don't think anyone can really hear them, it's not like we say them loudly). My first experiences with Anime was what he rented. This was back when it was called Japanamation. He really is an awesome person.

My mom I get many of my left wing views from, and we mostly agree about things. I'm a lot more pragamatic about things, and I don't think that just because things should be some way doesn't mean that you should expect it to be like that.I got many of my bad ideas about male female relationships from her, and it wasn't until fairly recently in my life I evolved from sexually repressed to perverse and still feminist.

I'm probably a better one now that I'll hit on women. Any woman that hates men and doesn't think we should hit on women is a bad feminist. She never said anything directly like that mind you. I probably picked my bad idea's about sexuality and male/female relationships from the media. That stuff messes up people good. Took me roleplaying to sort that out. And there's such a stigma about it. Amusing.

Though the enviromentalism comes more from my Sister's. Those two I got good values from. Seems they managed to figure things out pretty good. They may or may not have Asperger's. They are aboslutely both extremely smart. That we did all turn out so smart probably says a lot about their parenting.

My parents are hippies so i have allways got on well with them ( though several of my siblings dont). My dads very clever but had a midlife crisis when he was fourty odd and has gone abit crazy since. I have learnt alot from him though, like chess and philosphy and a love of books. My mum is alot like me, lives in her own world and does things her way. She's the only person i know who comes from canada, strongly identifies with britain (her adopted country) and looks like a traditional russian woman. Go figure!!
Anyway, my parents have allways pretty much let me do my own thing and have allways been there if i needed them. I'm the oldest of six so when everyones home it can be very noisey and chaotic. Oddly enough that doesn't bother me too me, i guess i know i can allways escape to my bed and a good book, it worked for most of my childhood.
I live with another relative at the moment, but if i didn't i'd be living with my parents, i'm not good at living by myself.

I know i'm lucky, i never had to deal with the problems at home that most people seem to have had, in my family eccentric (or AS) is pretty much normal. Many of my relavtives are very strange so i don't really stand out....

this is from the moms point of view as the relationship I have with my son who has AS.. Long time ago I decided to have a baby on my own and let daddy be a part time parent.. he was ok and my son has a small relationship with him.. 4 years ago this week I met the man who forever changed our lives. my son has a very very close relationship with my husband Marc (stepdad) he has given up his career as a graphic artist to stay at home to raise our children.. Ryan has and will always be Marc's son.. Ryan comments often how Marc is a better dad that his own dad and pays attention to him and understands him much better.. My X is a decent person but he denies that Ryan has AS. Marc never denies this. he is there for every teacher confrence, there every day to pick him up after school and makes sure that he has a chance to be a kid.. just be there to show him support and love and not denial.

What I would love is that years later Ryan can be on here and tell you all how wonderful his step dad Marc is.. how Marc has been the one who has shared all those important things in his life.. has held his head as he pukes.. how he remembers how his step dad got news that he was very ill and caught the 1st train out of NYC to hold his and mine hand.. and how he admires Marc for all the things he gave up to be with him.. I know that Ryan considers Marc to be his best friend but still the dad who teaches him so much guy stuff.. like computers, his love of art and photography. I can see that Marc has a deep bond with Ryan and always will. they are two peas in a pod.. So I can only hope that he can tell you all about the guy who understood him.. not that he would not want to hear what mommy gave up but I am sure that Marc would win out on the story telling..

I am sure that Ryan will tell you that Mommy was there for him but at times distant.. (I have my own issues) but did all she could do to make sure that he has all the things he needs. not always what he wants.. he will tell you that mom never made him eat stuff he did not like, she never really put him in places where he did not want to be. but always let him do his thing.. but taught him manners, and to enjoy the simple things in life..

i will also say that he will fill your ears with his little sister stuff.. he adores her.. she is 6 months and he is 9.. he will tell you how he remembers he crying and he helped her stop.. and how he is the best big brother he can be to her..

I hope that he has good things to say to you in years later about his family..

My relationship with my parents is up and down. I find it like a tangent from Trigonometry, but even at that my parents love me and want to do whats best for me. I got a little bit better at not yelling at them, and that was because I saw my friend and how he treated his parents; I became so disgusted that I quit acting like that, but I was never trying to act like my friend.

I would say neither are aspie. I have a half-sister from my father's first wife, that
i feel could easily be on the austic sprectrum. So I think the autisic gene could
be lurker in my dads side of the family. My mom , me and my half-brother
from my mom's first husband easily have ADHD.

I have my Moments, but it's good for the most part.

I geton okay with my mother...havent seen my father in years though

my mom is ok is i guess. and i don't know my dad