Here's my attempt at a poem everyone!

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Joined: 11 Nov 2011
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16 Feb 2014, 2:32 pm

Corners and circles
Matchboxes and smoke
Kindness of strangers
Dangerous choice.

Condensation on buses
Indelible ink
Poetic graffiti
Too twisted to think. :lol:

The gardens were buzzing
Live for the day
Tomorrow comes quickly
But the memories stay.

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i_wanna_blue
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16 Feb 2014, 4:19 pm

I like its randomness. there's a lot of imagery which is very unique, things most people wouldn't think of.

babybird
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16 Feb 2014, 4:41 pm

Thank you Blue

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salamandaqwerty
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16 Feb 2014, 4:50 pm

I honestly think you are a natural poet BB it just seems to be part of your nature, I think It's great and I hope you do some more.

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babybird
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16 Feb 2014, 5:04 pm

salamandaqwerty wrote:

I honestly think you are a natural poet BB it just seems to be part of your nature, I think It's great and I hope you do some more.

Thanks. It was just pictures out of my memory bank.

If I get some more little snippets I'll jot them down sharpish before they escape me again.

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Stannis
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16 Feb 2014, 5:32 pm

i_wanna_blue wrote:

I like its randomness. there's a lot of imagery which is very unique, things most people wouldn't think of.

I just noticed something. The lines seem to be paired into positive and negative potentialities of dating.

Kindness of Strangers (your date is sane and kind).
Dangerous choice (your date is a maniac).

etc.

Probably not though. I had some other ideas about what this meant, but then I realised that they were ad-hoc, and probably inappropriate, so I deleted them :oops:

It was an excellent poem

Last edited by Stannis on 17 Feb 2014, 1:35 am, edited 46 times in total.

CockneyRebel
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16 Feb 2014, 6:01 pm

That's brilliant!

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Dragoness
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16 Feb 2014, 6:04 pm

That's a pretty good poem. Thanks for sharing it.

Bateman
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16 Feb 2014, 6:17 pm

It's very nice, it has a good rhythm and good rhymes.
A pleasure to read.

Was it a conscious choice to not have a rhyme in the first stanza?

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MjrMajorMajor
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16 Feb 2014, 6:46 pm

:thumleft:

babybird
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17 Feb 2014, 4:48 am

Bateman wrote:

It's very nice, it has a good rhythm and good rhymes.
A pleasure to read.

Was it a conscious choice to not have a rhyme in the first stanza?

I don't really go out of my way to make it rhyme. I don't try and force it, I just let it happen and if I get it to rhyme then it's a bonus.

Thank you all for your appreciation of my little poem. It means a lot to me.

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wozeree
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