Shut Down or Melt Down

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I will deliberately shut down to prevent meltdowns.
I have had a few meltdowns; they are scary and i don't want to experience another one if i can help it.
Last time i had a meltdown i choked a good friend of mine (i stopped before anything serious happened, i did get control back), that was the moment where i decided to train myself to supress and stop meltdowns, whatever the (mental) costs might be.

Shutdown, nonverbal.

Melted down as a child, was often punished for it.

Learned to shut down instead (I'm not normally nonverbal but speech can be difficult during shutdown); this is also poorly understood by surrounding NTs but most seem to consider it less threatening.

Wow, so many of the responses on here could have been written by me. Like almost everyone else, I shutdown instead of melting down, but I used to meltdown all the time (especially when I was younger.) Seven years ago, I was prescribed a medication that quiets my emotions and I very, very rarely have meltdowns these days as a result. I also became much more successful in pretty much every aspect of my life because of that medication.

Interesting to see that quite a lot of you guys have shutdowns. I've never had one in my life, and I didn't actually know what they were until I first joined.
I used to have meltdowns all the time when I was younger, but not so much now. Though, I'd be lying if I said I never have them anymore. Every once in a while if stuff doesn't go right, then I can break down, get very teary and snappy, and start doubting myself.

Melt down here, but to be perfectly honest it's more like explode. (Mostly at inanimate objects) My dad is the same way.

^^^ Except I have more trouble w meltdowns and controlling them.

Shutdown

Shutdown

I've shut down and zoned out for as long as I can remember. But sometimes I am screaming internally

Depending on the exact situation and my overall trending mood, I'll either withdraw or I'll explode into rage. If I'm enraged, it becomes very difficult for me to calm down. I may go on for hours or days about whatever triggered me in the first place and then I drop off into the void of depression where I'll shut down. Being single and unattached does not make this easier to deal with.