How to avoid being perceived as flirty?

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Sometimes persons with neurodiversity (such as myself) can be perceived as flirty even when they neither intend any flirting nor causing the sole impression of doing it.

Some actions of some of us that can trigger being perceived as flirty when one isn't trying to do anything are:

- Talking to others in a way which is unexpected for them, even if one has a reason for doing so (but that reason would sometimes be non-obvious to others). This could be like talking to someone because one simply is interested in something, because of a "collecting information about something" intention. Like asking a woman who owns a cat that one simply was wondering if this very cute cat would also sometimes be able to make some outdoor discoveries, and stating that one has been loving cats for so many years.

- Making some pure factual statements, e.g. "I like the color of your dress" (Side-note: whenever I write something like this, this doesn't necessarily mean that I do it myself or that I did it in the past.)

- "Non-standard" usage of some words, even if one only does it because it is one's personal tradition or something like that.

- The "gaze" which sometimes is perceived as staring even if it isn't the case.

- Explicitly saying something like "please don't get me wrong, I do not intend to flirt with you or anything" (as surprising as it may be to some, there is a large number of people who sometimes can understand something entirely different in this case, other than what one really is trying to say)

- Talking about some matters that others consider too personal when someone doesn't really know someone else yet.

So how exactly to avoid being perceived as flirty when one isn't trying to do anything?
Or how to at least reduce the possibility of causing that false impression?

And as for something else, not related to this thread's topic, but simply because I am rather new to WP:

Is there something you consider as a static upper limit for opening new threads in this subforum?
What I am trying to say is : Of course I am not at all even considering opening an "insanely high number of threads" every day or anything like that. But because I am currently really, really deepening both of my theoretical and applied knowledge about All Things Communication, I could sometimes feel inclined to opening more than just one or two threads on at least some days. Now I am fully aware of the fact that something like this wouldn't be done without sufficient reasons. But sometimes there may be some. This is because that whole topic (i.e. communication) is one out of several Very Major Special Interests of mine that are even more important to me than a certain number of other Things One is Really Interested in While Also Calling Them Special Interests, Too. And even those things are really important to me .

Long story short, is there anything you consider a static upper limit for the opening of new threads in this subforum, like "1 or 2 at most per day, but 3 would really be too much"? (Again, if anybody reading it right now would be under the impression of myself possibly being a Way Too High Frequency Poster, he/she could refer to the paragraph above ).

You can start as many threads as you want—as long as you don’t start threads about the same thing all the time, or post about the same thing in multiple subfora.

I post almost 30 times a day. Nobody has said that I post too much.

Also: respond to the threads of others, as well as start threads. It’s only fair.

Well, I do intend to respond to the threads of others again, and if I am not mistaken, I already did so a few times . (Also, I realize that you didn't even negate it . Just saying).

If someone has tips on the not coming off as flirty thing please let me know as well. I'm lost. I remember talking to an older male friend and he said that he kind of knew I liked him because of a conversation we had before some r=years back. I thought I wasn't even thinking sex or anything how did he think I liked him or had an attraction. He just said he's perceptive on those things.

Totally didn't help me with figuring out what I did to make him think that.

OMG yes! Happens to me too. Have no idea what to do with it. Think it may have something to do with wonky eye contact, but how do you fix that? The moment you start focusing on your eye contact is the moment when it really becomes noticeable.

New hypothesis: guys just project their fantasies on women. Basically, if he fancies you, his subconscious turns it round to you fancying him. It's not his fault, you Jezebel you. Or something like that. Does that even make sense? I will never figure men out. They don't make sense.

It was me who asked the original question on "how not to be perceived as flirty by a woman".
But there were some new things I learned. So maybe I just would share them...

Not a complete answer, but: Many neurotypical persons have a rather strong perception on All Things Society . However, sometimes they are based on their Usual Society Experiences Only.

So when a person with neurodiversity does something that would fit into a certain Usual Society Behavior Pattern Category, they could perceive it as something they know and recognize.

(In case it isn't entirely clear what I meant, more than happy to re-phrase it with more details. It's just that I recently switched to As Brief As Possible Explanations ).

There may be a minor work-around: Looking at one eye, then another. But it is a minor one with some possible (new) pitfalls...

Recently I talked to a woman at a shop. She _possibly_ perceived me as flirty (rather high probability).

On another day, I came back. I was talking to another (woman) shopkeeper whom I know better than the other. Simply told her: "You know, I am a person with neurodiversity [...]. So if your co-worker perceived me as flirty, just wanted to tell you: That one look ("gaze") that people see when I keep eye contact, it is the only one available to me. There just would be a small work-around of looking at one eye, then another, but that's all".

And the shopkeeper I talked to really did understand it without any problems or even insults etc.

There are times when somebody thinks of a person as being flirty-----when they WANT that person to be flirty.

Sometimes, that's really the only explanation.

I might, say, see flirtatious eyes in a woman when there is no flirtation present at all. Merely because I WANT that woman that to flirt with me.

Never thought of it that way.
(Other than being aware of the general "seeing something because of wanting to see it" pattern).

I make sure I stand a comfortable distance away from the other person, i.e., out of their personal space, so they don't get the wrong idea. Another thing I do--and a lot of people think this is a bad idea because I come off as being extremely standoffish--is cross my arms and retreat into myself a bit.