Some of my work...really freaking nervous posting it.

Page 1 of 1 [ 5 posts ] 


What do you think?
This rules, could make a comic out of this! 33%  33%  [ 2 ]
You suck, give up loser! 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
This isn't so bad, not that good but it's not that bad...it's so-so 33%  33%  [ 2 ]
hmm...pretty good 33%  33%  [ 2 ]
uhm...kinda sucks dude 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Total votes : 6

Chakapew
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 30 May 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 46

28 Jul 2007, 2:14 am

Hey I just write this stuff down for fun and wanted to see what other people thought of it. For awhile I thought of making stories about this char here. Maybe in the future I will post others on this board as well. Oh and don't need to hold back on comments if you got em, I want total honesty.

Name: Johnny Auger but prefers the title Dammed Saint
Height: 6,4
Age: 28
Appearance: http://people.whitman.edu/~herbrawt/photos/Darkman0.jpg
http://www.internationalhero.co.uk/d/darkman0.jpg
http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q3/C ... adilla.jpg

Powers/Abilities: Marksman Skills with handguns, High level of acrobatics, martial arts, and enhanced adrenaline when pumped through his body puts him into a rage that makes him a great fighter even for superpowered foe. Extreme level and at times very unorthodox methods of trainning in various workouts to build his body to beyond normal peak human limits making him able to do feats that no ordinary human could acomplish although this is also helped by a special nutritional suppliment to enhance his fitness. This makes him very strong, fast, resiliant, and agile for a human. Expert in human biology and can use that knowledge to make precision strikes to try and cripple his enemies.

Weakness: Due to the fact that he spends almost all of his time trainning even his hobbies have to do with his trainning it has developed into something of an obsession. His body developed a physical dependency on the nutritional suppliment and has to take a set amount every hour or he will get progressivly weaker and if he goes too long without it his body will just shut down putting him into a coma or possibly kill him. Has virtually no leadership abilities due to so many years of being a mere subordinate. He is also willing to use villian's tactics to get his way ie lies, manipulation, and even murder (in extreme situations) which could easily lead to heroes not trusting him. Since he spends all of his time trainning he doesn't have any real skills outside of combat or knowledge of that many academic subjects. Suffers from the pain of chronic cluster headaches and takes various illicit drugs in order to cope with the pain but it can still severly spike on him any time. During those moments he is easily distracted leaving him open for attack. Has virtually no skills outside of stealth and combat making his range of usefulness limited. Has a very delicate mind leaving him much more susceptible to psionic attacks.

Clothing: Full black outfit that is slightly baggy with a hood that he keeps on all of the time with matching gloves. A mask around the mouth area with a rusty red trim on it covering most of his face the fabric stopping a couple of inches below his eye line. An eyepatch over his right eye his left milky white eye only showing and the only part of his skin that is exposed. A series of leather slings around his back and waistline to carry around his weapons and personal items.

Weapons: A double voluge with the staff part made from bamboo. When the blades are removed the staff's ends are frayed, dual tonfas, one nunchaku, one heavily modified luger, and one heavily serrated single edged scimitar.

Martial Styles: Has no distinct style but adopts moves and techniques from many different styles. However one very recurring element in his attacks is that he usually tries to slice the tendons and ligaments of his opponents not to mention breaking their bones to take them out of the fight quickly as possible.

Biography: He started out as a starry eyed youth that adored the superheroes. He was never interested in school and spent most of his days at the arcade shooting up bad guys with the realistic light gun. However one afternoon a supergroup known as 'Liberty League' landed their jet at the airport not far off to do some emergency repairs on their transport. He snuck onto the ship to take a look inside. However when he tried to leave they had already launched having recieved a mission from their HQ. So he effectivly became a stowaway on the ship but managed to hide even after they landed. Turns out they were trying to make their way into a Villian's lair to stop another evil scheme. He would try to play the waiting game until they got back but that was quite awhile. He got worried and would grab an experimental pistol they had stored in the mini armory on the jet. He wasn't sure what possessed him to do something so crazy but he would follow their path into the base. Plenty of defenses were still up but he managed to blast his way through. As it turned out the bad guy managed to defeat the 'Liberty League' and had them jailed up somewhere in the base. Instead of going to free them for some extra help he took the villian on alone. Seemed like he would be surely defeated but he beat the odds and took him down. After freeing the 'Liberty League' they were so impressed that they offered him a position on the team. This was a dream come true for Johnny so he jumped at the offer. He then became known as 'Trueshot' known for his shooting skills, acrobatics, and as well as his dashing good looks. He was part of a group known as "Liberty League''. During his time with the group he became close with another member. She shared feelings with him which eventually grew into marridge. It seemed as though everything was going great for him until one fateful day. They were storming the base of a villain known as 'Biohazzard' who was building a chemical bomb. During the mission Trueshot attempted to disarm a set of traps. When he did this caused a second set to activate and a vat of acid washed over his body scarring him badly for life. He passed out from the sheer pain of it. When he came to he found the base in shambles from a great battle that took place. As he staggered out he found his wife dead. Angered by his allies for leaving him to die and failing to protect his wife in his absence he returned to their base and in his blind rage he murdered them all. He was shortly apprehended and was sent to prison. However he manged to break out and became a Villain called 'Dammed Saint' taking his blind rage out on the rest of the world. Then one day simply out of the blue he began fighting for the good guys again. Nobody knows what compelled him to start fighting for the good guys again or why. He keeps his old villan name as well as his clothing as a symbol of his past sins.

Loyalty: Very questionable due to his past record as well as it being hard to tell when he is telling the truth or lying. Some wonder why or even if he wants to change back to who he was. Another reason why his loyalty has come in to question is his refusal to create any form of emblem or uniform that shows that he is allied with anybody.

Martial arts Origin: Johnny's martial arts origin comes from his early days as a hero. He wanted to do more than just tote a gun around he enrolled in a martial arts class and he was good real good. After only a few weeks of trainning he was able to best his own sensei. His sensei told him that he had nothing more to teach him now. Johnny wanted confirmation that this wasn't a fluke so he traveled across the city challenging the sensei of every martial arts dojo and somehow beat them all. They rewarded him with new moves and techniqes letting him build upon his skills. During his travels across the globe with his allies to fight evil he would also take side ventures to keep on challenging various masters of hand to hand combat. One day while walking through the streets of Nepal an old man on the street gave him an ancient scrol teaching of a long foregotten martial art and he hasn't been able to figure it out...yet. However he studies the scroll most of the time although it is driving him insane trying to figure it out.

Theme: Running Out of Time by Ozzy Ozbourne

Been around this world so many times
If you could only see my mind
I watch my secret heaven turn to hell

Faith alone has guided me
The ghost of my own destiny
I haven't even got a soul to sell

All the thing I put me through
I wouldn't wish my hell on you
You'll never know what's going on inside

Just another lonely broken hero
Picking up the pieces of my mind
Running out of faith and hope and reason
I'm running out of time
Running out of time

Trouble always seems find
A way to live inside my mind
My haunted head and me remain alone
Underneath my masqerade
A simple man who's so afraid
I try to find a light to guide me home

Momma please just hold me tight
Feeling so afraid tonight
Cause your the only one that really knows

Just another lonely broken hero
Picking up the pieces of my mind
Running out of faith and hope and reason
I'm running out of time
Running out of time

Fighting for my sanity
Many nights of tragedy
Got to leave my Wretched ways behind

Just another lonely broken hero
Picking up the pieces of my mind
Running out of fate and hope and reason
I'm running out of time
Running out of time
I'm running out of time
Running out of time

Underneath my masquerade
a simple who's still afraid



Scramjet
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 12 May 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 178

28 Jul 2007, 3:45 am

I'd say if you routinely draw like it's shown in the last of the three links you posted, you shouldn't hesitate to go ahead with that comic! I'm not much into comics myself, so I can't say if your plot and concept ideas are "old hat" or something like that...



MrSinister
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Oct 2006
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,560
Location: England

28 Jul 2007, 6:57 am

I'll be honest - the origin for this guy sounds like something out of the 90s (not that I think that's a bad thing - the 90s was when I first got into comics seriously, so I have a soft spot for that decade), but I like the fact that he's a non-powered anti-hero type.


_________________
Why so serious?


Chakapew
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 30 May 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 46

28 Jul 2007, 1:55 pm

Yea that is where I really enjoyed the comics. These days the comics are too much about the visuals not much on the story...hell the only time I got excited was when I saw the issue when Captain America got killed. Oh and I can only write I can't draw worth a hill of beans, that's why I am looking to comission an artist to draw up the chars for me heh. I do admit I did get inspiration from "Darkman" but after the ugliness it's all me heh heh heh.



TrueDave
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jul 2007
Age: 52
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,062

28 Jul 2007, 3:00 pm

I agree its 90's style. Which is fine as long as he doesnt wear a brown leather bomber jacket with the sleeves rolled up! ( ug, remember them?) Did you ever read Stan Lees' Ravage 2099? the first 8or 9 issues were good. He was an anti hero alittle like yours. I liked the low tech in a high tech world the book had.
However for the philosophy alone I reccomend the Marvel 10 issue miniseries Foolkiller. from your characters outline I'll guarentee you'll love it!