magz wrote:
Lely wrote:
You say it yourself, it depends on the culture. In poor countries family ties are extremely important, and even with arranged marriages the partners often stay together for life even when it wasn't love that united them or when they can't really stand each other. But that doesn't mean long term monogamy is something that is fixed in our DNA, or that humans are by nature monogamous with only one person for a lifetime. It is a behaviour that depends on factors such as society, laws, upbringing, peer pressure, emotional or financial dependence,... It is a choice (unless forced) not a natural instinct.
Would that mean that if you don't like to be bothered by pressure on looks, a poorer society is better for you? Lol

But this is contrary to my observations: in the 1980s, when Poland was extremely poor, all women wore high heels, heavy makeup and they looked like going to an elegant party all the time. The same is still visible in Ukraine. As our economy improved, the fashion relaxed.
Joe: Maybe you have a friend to help you with all the wedding? Someone more willing to listen to you than your mother? Or some other ally?
No. The long term partner doesn't eliminate her instinct to want to be found attractive (even if not by him).
It doesn't matter if the society is rich or poor, in any society men place more value on women's beauty than women place on men's beauty. Men are expected to demonstrate qualities that women are not expected to show to the same amount and vice versa. Both men and women want to appear as attractive as possible to find the best mate. In reality an average woman with or without makeup gets an average man. But still I believe man and woman try to attract each other and that instinctively she tries to appear as beautiful as possible, to get the best she can get. A man will be more attrscted to beauty than to money or intelligence, on average. Men also try to impress women with their qualities. Both genders are attracted to different qualities, so women will enhance their beauty more than men, using the method of beauty enhancement that is popular in their society, for example makeup.
I dont think in any society men and women will ever be expected to demonstrate exactly the same qualities, because men and women are different and in addition value each other's qualities differently.