Seeking input/advice for 17-yr-old daughter

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^^ It still agitates me. I'm hoping my hifi concert earplugs help with this. I'm considering polarized eyeglasses. I think when we are diagnosed there ought to be guidelines given:
Sensory Processing difficulties? If so: A, B, C
Executive Function difficulties? If so: A, B, C
Communication difficulties with NTs and/or ASDs? A, B, C

I couldn't agree more. Our diagnosing psychiatrist was great, but isn't taking new patients for ongoing treatment, only diagnosis. Regardless of the age of the child, to be sent away with a basic diagnosis and no guidance is difficult. I've had a hard time over the past few months on a number of levels and haven't done nearly enough investigative work I need to to find the help and resources we need.

I know she has difficulty with social interaction and executive function. I don't think there is much in the way of sensory issues. And on the cusp of adulthood, I find it such a difficult age to deal with a lot of this stuff. I am gearing up for a big talk with her, to discuss her and my need for help and guidance.

I read that 90% of ASD folks have sensory difficulties. Personally that seems high b/c my AS-like BFF seems hyposensitive. However, I didn't know until just last week that I myself have difficulties. I mean, I sort of knew, but I couldn't tell: I knew it was loud or bright I'd think I was managing, but now I can see I wasn't aware that my agitation was increasing, then some additional stress would set me off and the underlying contributors were missed. Now I can look back and think of ALL THOSE TIMES, some hifi earplugs would have saved me hardship (even desperation in college). I think some folks like me with ASD aren't aware of the causes to our Difficulty. So once again, if I had been asked earlier this year if earplugs or polarized sunglasses would have helped me, I would have said "no, that's silly". That's the story of my life "I'm fine" and I was not. Would I have listened to someone else suggest these things in college? Maybe not, but a seed would have been planted... and perhaps germinated earlier than 30 years later.

As you can tell, I could talk about this stuff (in detail) forever. As always, wishing you all well as you navigate your situation for yourselves.

Musing: I wonder if hifi earplugs would help me in job interviews. Is there a Thinking filter that could reduce that "noise"?

My sensory issues have become far harder with age. I don't even remember them being a big deal as a child. Now, there is literally no way I could be in a room with a fluorescent light tube. My whole brain starts shutting down... In our noisy school cafeteria, I am ok if I am just with my husband in a corner but if I am in a group the whole room starts spinning. Saying that I know my sensory issues far better now. When I need deep focus I put on loud music and my enormous ear defenders ( I love the pressure of the loud music in the air but the quiet of the ear-defenders) and I sit on my tippy toes squatting on my chair to maximise groundedness and pressure through a small point of contact. It is amazing, I go into a hyper focus I never could before. So it is for better or worse. I make sure I never schedule meetings in busy places, I make my students work in a semi-darkened room with mood lights and ban the fluorescent light tube and I get by. However, I worry that they will get worse and worse..... I literally live in my Roca super black sunglasses for extreme light-sensitivity: they have changed my life.

I remember flying solo with my autistic daughter when she was about 4 and her newborn little sister in a sling and I would be in a dirty airport bathroom literally doing acrobatics to cover the sensor hold our bags and get toilet paper etc. for my older daughter. It was horrendous and so debilitating. And then the handfan would sound up and it would all be doomed!I can't believe I wasn't smart enough to use the disabled toilets, they have changed our lives.

Maybe volunteering at an animal shelter or farm and taking one community college course (an introductory science course seems like a good idea) over the summer would give her a better idea of what she wants to do without overwhelming her.