Anyone else blackout during meltdowns?
dossa
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I have had meltdowns and not been able to recall anything I did. Same can be said for when I shut down. I do have a dissociative disorder though... I sometimes dissociate under stress. And if I am having a meltdown or a shutdown, you can bet I am stressed, so it makes sense to me that I would do that. I am surprised more people have not gone blank during meltdowns.
A bit of dissociation is common for many people. Like Kraftiekortie was mentioning with the road trance... people sometimes do things on automatic and it is generally not problematic. Boredom, stress, sleepiness, some type of emergency... a lot of things cause memory gaps in people.
It can be disturbing though when you come to and have zero recall of what it was you were doing... especially when what you were up to could cause you or someone else bodily harm. I get that and I am not trying to dismiss what you have going on, OP, but I would not worry much about it if I were you. If it has been almost ten years since this happened to you and the last time was as a teen... yeah. Teenagers have so much going on not only in their bodies, but in brain growth, and life in general... it's a stressful time in life and teens are not often equipped to manage all of it. Toss bullying into the mix and it seems understandable to me that you would go boom. It would seem though you outgrew that sort of thing though. Kudos to you for that.
I do think it is nice and responsible of you to want to proceed with caution with this stuff. If it is really concerning you, maybe just be mindful of your stress levels and perhaps keep something on your person that calms you when you go out among the masses.
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"...don't ask me why it's just the nature of my groove..."
it's not that I've outgrown it, as much as it is that I've been lucky enough to not have been in a situation that could have caused it since then. the worst one I've ever had was a memory gap for the entire day...first thing I remember is getting on the school bus, the next is being at my house. 12 hours later. I can remember every exact detail of what I was doing the day the first episode of the Pokemon show premiered in NA. So my memory is pretty good, gaps that large where it's a complete blank not just a little fuzzy or vague are quite problematic. During another blackout event when I was 13 in 7th grade and barely weighed 80 pounds, I was told that 4-6 cop cars showed up to the school because I went running after another student through the halls (long story, not comfortable sharing it here)...now I'm 23, weigh 154, with martial arts experience (Kyokushin and Tae Kwon Do) which means if it happens again it could very easily get worse...
But again, i'm not looking for advice, I've already found a way to prevent that much stress from building up. (back then was a really dark part of my life both emotionally and mentally, also not keen on sharing exact details here) I exercise a lot more, especially when I get angry or frustrated, (usually both at the same time) such occasions I hop on my mountain bike and go for a ride. I'm just curious who else has had blackouts during a meltdown or similar situation.
Apparently my uncle and grandfather on my fathers' side both had episodes of extreme anger/violence that they later had no recollection of. They were both institutionalised at various points in their lives, with these incidents being the impetus. I'm afraid I haven't got many details as I didn't know my grandfather very well, and I've never met my uncle though he's still alive. Sounds a bit more similar to your experience though Abyssalrider. I actually think my dad does this too (he vehemently denies a really awful argument we had a couple of years ago; he literally didn't speak/acknowledge anyone for a week, yet now claims it didn't happen).
That is a long time.
I've definitely had this on the way to school a few times, spooky
nick007
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I wonder if it's something like rage blackouts. I found something here http://www.justanswer.com/mental-health ... -real.html
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"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
"Hear all, trust nothing"
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition
read the link, and it sounds about right...but it has also happened on rare occasions during some regular meltdowns from over-stimulation (hasn't happened since getting my service dog five and a half years ago though)
LaurenLissa
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Joined: 24 Oct 2016
Age: 33
Gender: Female
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Location: Oklahoma
This has happened to me once, and I'm so glad to see a thread about it!
I was really overstimulated and angry with my sister. We were at a trolley stop, and I just flipped. I have no idea what I said to her. I only remember really violent thoughts for a little bit and then nothing. When I started being conscious of my actions afterward, I was still upset but I was no longer angry. I didn't even realize I blacked out until my sister talked to me later about the awful things I had said.
This happened when I was 22. I'm 25 now. Never happened before and never happened since.
When I was about nine or 10, I had an episode where I was being bullied. That made me sensitive to people laughing at me. My sister laughed at me one day and wouldn't stop. I blacked out. When I came to, I had just grabbed a rag from her, but it caused her to fall. After that, I was too scared of what I could've done that I learned to basically zone out when stressed.