Looking after baby

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I have to. I will. She really thinks other people standing up for themselves agaisnt her is a sin. She takes it personally.

Yet she's always encouraging my to stand up to people in retail. It's like when we go into a shop she wants me to be a Karen like she is.

When she crashed her car into another car (her fault, the other guy had right of way and she didn't look where she was going) she wanted me to stand up for her.

What happens after 17 years? One of us dies?

Yeah, blue light is supposed to be bad for sleep. I've never liked cool lighting, it just feels depressing to me. I've got warm bulbs all over, and I've got Christmas lights up all year for dim lighting.


It's worth a try. I don't know how much it will help at her age, but it's supposed to simulate the "wooshing" sound of blood in mother's womb. Most white noise machines just have rain/ocean sounds on loop. Some of them are kind of nice to listen to, though.

I think they say something like a hair dryer is closer to the proper frequency, though...maybe if you could record one or download a recording and loop it over some speakers?

I know when ours was a lot smaller, and the colic was really, really bad, the overhead fan in the bathroom would help calm him a little bit.


I can't imagine they would stay on a baby's head for very long =)


Your daughter will be 18, and in theory, will no longer be dependent on her parents.

Maybe I should reprogram the lights in such a way that she can't control the colour temperature.


Very true.


Your daughter will be 18, and in theory, will no longer be dependent on her parents.[/quote]
But the conflict between my partner and I will continue.

Anyway I don't really want to kick my daughter out when she turns 18. It seems cruel. She might not have the means to support herself. I want her to leave when she has the means to support herself and when she chooses to. That's the way it was with me.

She can gradually live more independently while still living at home until she feels practically and emotionally ready to leave. That's the way it was with me.

Yeah, that's why I said "in theory". I didn't want to make any assumptions, especially when it comes to the autism spectrum.

So this may sound terrible, but I found I was pretty good at interpreting what my infant wanted if I approached him like a pet. If you're good with animals like I am, you're probably good at ready their body language and sounds...so baby body language is the same thing, just different motions/sounds to memorize. You can find articles and videos about common things babies do and train yourself to recognize them, and recognize patterns unique to your baby. Babies also mimic parents, so you may notice her copying your happy stims, etc. I honestly find babies and kids easier than many adults because they don't lie or cover up their reactions to things. An angry baby is ANGRY. A toddler who hates peas will let you know. No "politeness filter" to navigate.

I also think you and your partner should sit down, preferably with a neutral third party like a counselor, and work through what is and isn't acceptable as far as different parenting styles. All parents go through some of this, and it involves compromise on both sides. My spouse keeps our kid up later than I'd like, but we compromised on that since he can sleep in and not be harmed by staying up later at night. Similarly, we don't spank our kid because I can't stomach the idea of hitting a child. My partner was raised in a household with lots of spankings and doesn't see the issue, but he respects that we need to both agree so he doesn't do it.

So how's Daddy Duty going for you?

It's funny, my son is barely two years old, and he's already obsessed with busses and trains >_< We're pretty sure he's going to be autistic like me.