If I’m Not Autistic What Could It Be?

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One of the problems with not being diagnosed is you and loved ones don’t know you are autistic. My first marriage suffered because my wife became weary and eventually angry about behavior on my part that she perceived to be anti-social and self-centered and intentional when I had no idea I was doing so. She and I both agree that had we known then we could have adjusted our expectations. I had and still have difficulties with my new wife in this regard; she is the one who asked me to get tested.

Now I am always aware of how I come across to people. In a professional setting I cannot afford to be off putting.

You really ought to get tested.

I just wanted to provide an update. Apparently my therapist DOES think I have autism (she said she's 75% sure and in my case it's mild). She said she has worked with adults who have autism and her son does too and I remind her of him (to her amusement). But she didn't want to write that down because my insurance wouldn't cover the sessions! So officially she's putting me down as having anxiety and that's what she wants to focus on anyway. She said anxiety and high-functioning ASD share many symptoms (needing structure, difficulty with change, etc), but most people don't notice and aren't affected by smells and sounds the way I am. She said I'm the only patient she's had that has done all the homework she's given (I wasn't expected to?) and the only man who has ever told her his house smells nice...

She also said she thinks I have ADHD. I asked her if it's possible to have OCD, ADHD and ASD at the same time and she said yes. But she wants to focus on anxiety, and so do I, so I'm ok with not making anything official (it's not like I want accommodations or anything) I just want my therapist to understand me, and I think she does so far.

After the session I realized I did not get an answer to the "wouldn't have gotten this far in life" statement. I asked for clarification but she either didn't say or I don't remember or misinterpreted somehow. She apologized for not explaining further, I guess maybe that's what her "official statement" was because of the insurance but not her real opinion? Or because she thinks my ASD is very mild and doesn't need treating the way my anxiety does? I'm not sure. I seem to misinterpret or fail to remember things a lot.

If you are mildly Autistic would it be preferable to you to have it formally diagnosed...even if there is no insurance benefit? Would you still be eligible for sessions by virtue of your other diagnoses?

Personally, I was glad to have formal confirmation that I have an Autism Spectrum Disorder, Level 1 (Mild) even though I had no interest in any therapy for it. (And the Psychologist who diagnosed it realized I was not a good candidate for therapy...she barely mentioned that she offered that kind of therapy and quickly noted she doubted I would be interested.)

In my case I think the Autism in me likes clear, literal, definitive language...and I figure it is the NTs that settle for close-enough, no need for real precision.

In my case, it was Schizotypal personality disorder and severe anxiety. Both Aspergers and Schizotypal have similarities, but there are also many differences.

Just so you know DSM is available online. PDF format, no problemo.

For 75 percent chance I think thats pretty low. Means you are well adjusted.
You anxiety is understandable.

I think if your anxiety is causing you most of the problems then she is being fairly logical in her approach.

ASD simply does not have solution. The fact she acknowledge you being autistic just means she knows, and can see more than is visible to the eye.

Note that International diagnostic manual is different from DSM and that psychiatry is still in its infancy in case of scientific approach, theory formation, and applying solutions to real life.

Pretty sure most rigor that goes into natural science is not used in psychology and unfortunately most psychologist in USA are pill oriented and lack more nuanced approach.