have you ever been psychotic?

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have you ever had a psychotic episode?...what was it like for you?

Yeah and I'm beginning to think that I'm prone to psychotic events as I've had a few in my adult life.

The most recent one was in the last 5 years and related to ptsd.

It's hard to say what it was like because at the time that it was happening I didn't really realise the severity of it.

Looking back I was completely in need of psychiatric help even hospitalisation.

I was exhausted. Deluded. Violent. Angry. Confused. Depressed. I was having hallucinations as well. I didn't know what was real and what wasn't and I was struggling between recognising the past from the present. I was absolutely paranoid as well. I think the paranoia was the most exhausting thing to cope with but at the time I didn't know I was paranoid. It was like everything that was happening around me was magnified x1000.

I'm getting treatment now but that's for the first time in my life. I'm working towards this kind of thing never happening to me again but I dunno if that's even possible.

Well it's a bit scary. I'm hoping that in the future I'll be able to spot early warning signs.

I hope you don't have to go through it again too

Yes. It feels like a constant battle between me and someone else taking over.

No, I haven't.

Never.

I have. I’m taking medication now. In a strange way, it was fun. My mind was working at full capacity. But, I also became exhausted, paranoid, delusional, etc. That part was not fun.