So I have a less-than-desirable dating history. Everyone I've ever dated has seemed to be poly. While I don't have a problem w/ polyamory directly, as in if you are that's chill and I respect you, I am incredibly uncomfortable with it in my own relationships. As someone with severe attachment issues and separation anxiety, the idea of my partner not being exclusive destroys me. My discomfort with it has ended up in cheating and a ton of broken boundaries. It has caused me to be incredibly terrified of dating.
My current partner, however, is polar opposite from anyone I've ever dated. They've never pressured me or made me feel like my boundaries didn't matter. A big thing with me is ranting about my special interests (usually accidentally). My exes would usually tell me to shut up or that I was annoying which really hurt. It got me into a habit of asking if I was annoying them (which I've finally broken from) My current partner, however, encourages me to ramble. (they say it's cute)
I've never felt so loved or respected. They brought me flowers and a snack today for no reason. It's not even an anniversary. I love this man sm (he's genderfluid so I may have switched around pronouns)
01 Dec 2023, 9:51 am
