fear of looking stupid

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Can someone help I have tried to private message someone but can't seem to make it work I thought you just pressed the pm button at the bottom of their post. I would never normally ask for fear of looking stupid but hope I have found a community that won't judge.

I wanted to message a young man, well young to me 36 who sounded quite desperate and said he had no one to talk to. Sat here in tears knowing just how he feels. Big question I have only recently been told that I am probably on the spectrum so my special interest is now ASD hoovering up everything I can find the irony isn't lost on me.
So I read that being autistic means not having empathy Professor Simon Baron-Cohen but I struggle to not get upset if I see someone or something in distress I try very hard not to show it I fight back the tears and wait until I am alone but am extremely motivated to want to help. Is that not empathy, perhaps I miss the subtle signs that someone is not happy and my wife often points this out to me. I am deeply affected perhaps far more than is "normal" or healthy.

Some people can set their accounts so it does not accept PM's, but if you see a PM button, it does accept PM's.
Check you have put a message title in on the top as it will not send unless you have. (It gives a tiny message in bright red writing if you have not put the title in, but it can be ard to see).

I have found the PM thing a bit challenging as well. I have to memorize the person I want to send it to, search for their name (because it does not add the name automatically for me), click it, then add a title, then write the post. I am not very computer savvy but I’m trying. If you want, you can practice sending me a PM. Title it “test” if you want. Practice definitely helps.

Side note, I am very empathetic as well. I feel when someone else is hurting like it was happening to me. I cry when others cry. I just FEEL it. You are not alone in this.

Let us know if you need more assistance.

In case you are getting snagged where I did...

It took me awhile to realize that getting the recipient to show "Send to"/"username" field was insufficient.

After doing that I had to select "Add" so the recipient's username is shown in the "To:" field in the "Compose Message" portion of the panel.

...otherwise I've got no suggestions.

Thank you for your help I didn't realise you had to put an address or something in before sending a message. I thought if you hit the button at the bottom of their post your reply would automatically go to them. So perhaps that's where I have been going wrong. One of you kindly sent a private message I think called test so I could practice but I managed to lose it and now can't find it. Has it gone for good or am I not looking in the right place, thankyou once again.

I PM'ed you. I will try again as soon as I am able. A bit overwhelmed at the moment with life stuff. I will be back soon. Keep trying. You will get it. I'm still learning as well. No harm in practicing.

The PM button at the foot of a post is bugged - it will open the PM composition window but doesn't fill in the destination name.

Instead, click on the avatar of the person you want to PM (either on the post you wanted to respond to via PM or on the avatar as displayed anywhere else - it doesn't matter, or the "Profile" button at the foot of a post) and then click on the PM button at the bottom of the next window, under their avatar.

This will open the same PM composition window but this time with the destination name correctly in place.


To locate your lost incoming PM, click on the "New messages" link at the top of every page, next to the Log Out button. (the New Messages link will show a number as required to indicate any unread PMs waiting for you)
The window displayed will default to the Inbox where you should find the PM.
On the left of that screen are links to the various other PM boxes.