Asperger's and ridiculously high sex drive
auntblabby
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goldfish21
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Age: 42
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Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
How in the world do you do this? I'm in the GSA club at my college, so I know who is gay, but I don't know how to approach them and ask for a hookup or whatever. The hell is your secret?
There are several factors at play here.
1) As mentioned, I do have superior social functioning to almost all on the spectrum. This is in large part due to the not-so-secret ways in which I've learned to treat my ASD that I've been sharing on these forums for a few years now. I'm also fairly intelligent, yes.. I suppose that doesn't hurt any - especially with being able to come up with just the right thing to say at the right moment, like any good salesman.
2) "Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right." - Henry Ford. Basically, I'm confident in my ability to do these things because I truly do believe I can. It's not a forced belief. It just is.
3) I'm a nice guy and, in general, people like me. That goes a long way whether first impressions or the compliments a friend makes about me in the presence of someone new.
4) I'm tall, decent looking, and quite physically fit at 6'2" 207lbs & 9.5%bf. Pride weekend I was also rocking a rainbow mohawk, my pretty epic beard, & a whole lot of party confidence. I also have a good suntan from spending more than 50 evenings at a nude beach. I look pretty good naked these days.
5) Hanging out at a nude beach, naked every time, makes one quite comfortable with themselves and their body. It's very liberating. It makes all social interactions easier, really. Once you hang out naked with a bunch of other naked people for a couple Summers regular "textile" conversations are a piece of cake.
6) Practice makes perfect.. I've done this so many times it's like taking candy from a baby. Seriously, there are a lot of times I'm offered sex and can't be bothered because I'd rather sleep, or go kiteboarding or w/e. Also, as with anything, the more you do it the better you get at it.. and I know I'm good at.. certain things - which creates an automatic confidence.
7) Come to think of it, a couple occasions at parties over the last year and over Pride weekend are about the only times in my life I've gone through this whole process live in person. (and have done so with natural ease - well, almost natural.. drugs and alcohol were definitely involved both on my part and my partners'.) The vast majority of hookups have been via internet personal ads, gay dating/hookup websites and phone apps. Almost all of them, actually. This allows me to utilize my ability to communicate better via text than in person.. however, in person I'm ever better and in person "chemically enhanced" I'm probably better than email. Perhaps someday I'll be just as smooth stone sober.
While it's fun when I feel like it, just like everyone else.. everyone wants what they can't have. I'd trade this life for a bf I was really into who was mutually into me. That hasn't happened yet. All in due time, I suppose. In the meantime I have a crush on a boy I met at Pride who's in a long distance relationship that I'd like to date if I could.. and I'll probably just continue hooking up here and there as I please until there's a proper mutual thing with someone. Ah well, at least crushes are fun.
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auntblabby
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Just thought i would create this thread to see what other people feel and whatnot.
SO basically im a 19 year old guy with Apserger's. I'm also a virgin and I consider myself Bisexual with a tendancy towards attraction to men.
I was just wondering if people are in the same boat as me and have a stupidly high sex drive. I've had sexual urges since 9 years old (No joke) and begun masturbation around 13 years old. I read on a research paper that people with asperger's tend to have incredibly high testosterone levels partially due to exposure in the womb (i might be wrong). particulalry during the teen years, this is quite obvious for some. People think im just saying this to try and fit in with NT teenagers when it's actually the truth. Sorry for the explicity in this post.
Alex D
P.S is it normal to have this high a sex drive when you're still a virgin?
Being exposed to a high level of androgens in the womb would not result in a higher sex drive outside of the womb. The androgens your body produces outside of the womb would be responsible for a higher than average sex drive. It's not uncommon for females to being to undergo puberty around the age of nine...while they often don't start menstruating until the age of 12, it's not uncommon for their breast development to begin at the age of 9, so I would not be surprised if it were not uncommon for boys to get urges at that age.
It may be that your sex drive is not unusually high for a male your age, but you would have to discuss with other males your age to determine this.
that's how old i was when started masturbating,with a stuffed curious george & to a movie about tigers then sometime after that,i started masturbating to wild women.
Just thought i would create this thread to see what other people feel and whatnot.
SO basically im a 19 year old guy with Apserger's. I'm also a virgin and I consider myself Bisexual with a tendancy towards attraction to men.
I was just wondering if people are in the same boat as me and have a stupidly high sex drive. I've had sexual urges since 9 years old (No joke) and begun masturbation around 13 years old. I read on a research paper that people with asperger's tend to have incredibly high testosterone levels partially due to exposure in the womb (i might be wrong). particulalry during the teen years, this is quite obvious for some. People think im just saying this to try and fit in with NT teenagers when it's actually the truth. Sorry for the explicity in this post.
Alex D
P.S is it normal to have this high a sex drive when you're still a virgin?
I have similar
I see this is an old thread, but I find it quite relevant to me anyway. I also remember being turned on by things from a pretty young age, and until nowadays, I found my sex drive to be quite intense. Some bad habits came out of that, which unfortunately led to me devaluing the more essential building blocks of an authentic relationship, and I guess ruining many of the chances I could've had at that before. I eventually found out that this could be having a negative effect on my dopamine levels, and even my brain by extension, which scared me enough that I decided to reevaluate what I'm doing. Since then I tried nofap, and although the longest period of time I can manage with that is usually about 2 weeks, I've become a lot more productive since then. But I still don't think I'm much closer to finding the type of relationship I'm looking for. I might still need to work on my "relatability", so to speak.
That's pretty interesting mentioning dopamine and what not.
I feel I need to stop sexualising people on apps, like the swipe left and right in tinder / scruff and grinder. But we all do it?
I find it easier having sex on holiday as I can switch into that mode, that okay I know this isn't going to turn into a relationship. I guess many in the gay world want sex then the relationship. Though I guess with meeting friends at events, festivals, pubs perhaps easier to develop a connection before sex/dating.
I feel ocd may have something to do with my high sexual energy , perhaps I need to isolate fantasy from reality.
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queer creative in Australia
Just thought i would create this thread to see what other people feel and whatnot.
SO basically im a 19 year old guy with Apserger's. I'm also a virgin and I consider myself Bisexual with a tendancy towards attraction to men.
I was just wondering if people are in the same boat as me and have a stupidly high sex drive. I've had sexual urges since 9 years old (No joke) and begun masturbation around 13 years old. I read on a research paper that people with asperger's tend to have incredibly high testosterone levels partially due to exposure in the womb (i might be wrong). particulalry during the teen years, this is quite obvious for some. People think im just saying this to try and fit in with NT teenagers when it's actually the truth. Sorry for the explicity in this post.
Alex D
P.S is it normal to have this high a sex drive when you're still a virgin?
I'm a 30 year old guy with Asperger's who also happens to be bisexual and who is unfortunately still a virgin. Furthermore I also have had a very high sex drive since I was 13, which is also when I first masturbated. I had never heard about the theorized connection between exposure to high testosterone levels in the womb and autism. However, I just read a few articles about it and it seems that while there might be a correlation between exposure to high levels of testosterone in the womb and autism, scientists doubt that autism is actually caused by exposure to high levels of testosterone. And yes, it is very normal to have a very high sex drive when you're still a virgin. It's probably at least partly the result of pent up sexual energy and feeling sexually repressed.
Same and mostly because of my extreme fetishes/kinks.
Usually 2-4 times I fap a day if extremely horny.
However my chronic physical illnesses and depression at times can make me much less horny or not at all.
So it really depends. Anxiety doesn't usually lower my sex drive.
If I'm physically 'well' and mentally 'ok' and bored. I can get extremely horny.
Jutty1224
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 20 Sep 2022
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 57
Location: Topsham, ME
I think I can relate to AlexD. For me I started doing it around 13 or 14. Sometime in the summer, I would wear sneakers to go swimming. I'm still a virgin at 48. When I was younger I thought I was straight. I thought everyone was back then. I've had fetishes. I've only had one girlfriend when I was 19/20. Never had the desire to do it with anyone. I'm disgusted and turned off by porn. I've only been curious about being non-sexually intimate with anyone who might be gender divergent, that I may find attractive. Unusual things arouse me. There has been a couple times in the past year that I've been in a clothing store checking things out and I've got that feeling down there.
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