What is your experience like with disassociation?

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I developed DID by age 5. Diagnosed when I was around 30.

I get derealization/depersonalization whenever I get a panic attack. Every time. And to any onlookers, it appears like there is nothing going on with me at all; other than my schizophrenia. I feel completely powerless every time.

The derealization, for me, manifests as me believing something bad is going to happen to me, like my bladder is going to explode. Or the lymph nodes in my arms are going to explode. I recently had an attack where I believed my appendix was going to explode. I am on Lexapro 30mg for it, but lately its effect seems to have diminished. And I think I am in denial of it. I know I have panic attacks, but something makes me believe that it's something worse. Like they are not really panic attacks, but something worse. But that's just my irrational nature kicking in. I just have a hard time accepting that, yes, I do indeed have panic attacks. And that they are nothing more, nothing less. They just are.

The depersonalization also happens to me during panic attacks. Like the derealization, it happens every time. I have schizophrenia, so maybe that's why I am so strongly themed to these two things; as feelings of unreality are the hallmark of psychosis. Like Rainbowstarsxoxo described, that's pretty much how I feel when I get depersonalization.

Dreamy trance like state of extremely spaced out vision where the world looks surreal and sounds are distant.
Is how I experience dissociation.
Sometimes my hands feel detached from my body and incredibly tiny.

Rarely I've had it last more than a few hours or a day from extreme panic or something that triggered my past traumas.Or my phobias.
However if my vestibular migraine gets triggered,that can cause dissociation that lasts days.

I just go out like a light and then when I come back it's like I've had some kind of tranquilliser.

Also on very rare occasions I have gone from point A to point B with absolutely no recollection of how I've got there but somehow no one had noticed that anything was amiss

I think it can affect people in different ways but I think it is related to trauma

I don't know much about it but I know from counseling with psychologist that I experience it and that my amnesia issues are related to it.

In a few bad situations in the past I was either very calm and seemingly "not there" and able to handle it well in the moment. And some I forgot completely. Like I even forgot the names of the people I knew well and forgot the day and place it happened. I was re told the things I forgot but even now I don't remember actually being there. It was over a decade ago but I forgot it some time between the time it happened and 5 years later when my family realized that I didn't remember a really big thing or who was involved.

Later learned that I similarly "forgot" multiple events. Maybe it was protecting me because I don't feel any real anxiety about those things. Found a dead body, witnessed a shooting/murder in public, and then that personal family event. I don't feel anything about those things even though they were probably very traumatic to all happen to someone between the ages of 5 and 10. I only remember the image of the bodies but nothing else. No words, no people around me, nothing about what I was wearing or doing at the time. Blank. So I don't feel anything about them.