No Connection

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I have been worried about this for a while, being on the spectrum are we not ''wired'' for a connection and ''settle down'' or are we just ''self involved? I have ''been with women'' many time in 38 years and have a ''high drive'' yet don't want anything serious. I always worry something is wrong with me, because at this time I don't want the ''family life'' I want to be able to do my hobbies and be with my dog, are many of us not suppose to follow ''social norms'' or feel connected? I know what is going on in the world and consider myself educated, but the older I get the more hermit like I become, almost everyone I went to school with seemed that they couldn't wait to start a family, and I always felt in my own mind and imagination

Can't see anything wrong with the way you've gone, if it suits you. Yet you say you worry about it - what's the worry about?

Relationships take many different forms. On the one end of the scale, some couples are very passionate and close, on the other end of the scale, some are like 2 hermits sharing a house. And everything in between. It’s worth being open to finding someone who fits your temperament, rather than ruling out relationships altogether.

what worries me at times is it a Aspie thing, that I don't really reach or follow social norms?

It does sound like an Aspie thing, though as I'm sure you know people on the spectrum are not all alike, so some will feel quite differently than you do. But more importantly, I think it's okay. If that's what you want, then it's fine and it's what's right for you.

I think it really depends on the person. A lot of the "lack of connection" comes from not investing in other people. I've invested a lot in my wife, and I miss her when she's gone. She's one of the few people I actually miss when they're not present for a few days.