Do we do certain things just so we don't regret it later?

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chris1989
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 2 Aug 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,207
Location: Kent, UK

24 Aug 2024, 6:53 pm

In a number of threads I have written, I've talked about myself comparing to other people who do different things in life or hobbies or interests which don't seem to interest me and I do understand that talking about this stuff too often on here can be a bit of a bore so I'm sorry. I just seem to feel that people maybe when they are young, do certain things in life just so they don't look back with regrets and I can say ''Yep, I did that and I don't regret it.'' Those things include going to plenty of fun and parties and drinks with your mates during 18 to 24, having a number of casual sexual encounters (one night stands) before settling down in a relationship, travel to many countries as possible, getting married and then having kids in the late 20s/early 30s.

I seem to think it was only since my mid to late 20s, when I was going to work and earning that my confidence and ability to try out new things got better and my social skills got better as time went on. I started travelling with family abroad to places (like Krakow and Rome), something I maybe I hadn't done since I was a kid. I ended up passing my driving tests and driving my own car for the first time thanks mainly to my dad who got me to do automatic lessons so his persuasion for me to drive paid off even though I wasn't someone who really really wanted to drive.

I do think all those things are great that I did them but there have been times when I wished I had the same confidence and ability to do those things during the 18 to 24 period. During that time I wasn't really in any paid employment although I did do voluntary work before university. I also remember being 19, during a college trip to London and not knowing how to use or count money until I was 20 or 21. My parents divorced when I was 18 and lived mostly with dad more than mum. I had panic attacks during my final year of college. My dad eventually moved to Essex where my stepmum lives and wanted me to find work over there but wasn't very keen in working in a county I never grown up in although I had a number of job interviews over there before getting the job I have now in my home county. I also during sixth form and university didn't go on trips to New York and Amsterdam possibly due to being around people I wasn't familiar with or spoke to much even though now due to changes in confidence in things now I'd like to go to New York and went to Amsterdam with my dad and stepmum a few years after leaving uni.