Sister

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My sister told me that she threw her back out and couldn't drive to my house today so I had to take two buses and a train to get there. Time, money and energy. My sister (45) was walking slowly and limping but otherwise appeared the same as usual. (Things are not always the way they appear). She was a medical doctor for 15 years. Last year she said she stopped working because of her 13 year old daughter. I didn't ask any questions because I am autistic and don't want to say something wrong. Her husband is an electrical engineer. They live in an expensive area and fancy house. They have two kids. I don't understand how they can continue to afford it financially after losing a doctors income. However I didn't have the nerve to ask because I was afraid she might overreact. Our parents died ten and five years ago. 45 is not young but seeing her limping like that made me afraid my own health will get worse than that because I am already 41. Middle aged. She is close to my height and weight. There is no reason why I would be a lot stronger than her. I have been working at home Depot for four years and counting. Pushing carts and loading merchandise. When I can't do that anymore I won't have a stream of income. Government benefits not guaranteed permanent or sufficient. I don't even have enough work credits, s**t.

I have only worked minimum wage, unskilled labor jobs. The longest amount of time I have had a job is four years. The second longest, five months, when I was 18. Bad work history. Long periods of unemployment. Got made redundant plenty of times

Sooner or later I will be injured, old, and disabled.

Seriously regret not getting my autism diagnosis before 18, not working younger, and getting made redundant from so many dumpster fire "jobs" s**t

my sister did not tell me what her daughter did that forced her to quit her job. i didn't ask, but i am curious, b/c medical doctor is not just "any old job". medical school costs a lot of $$$ and often doctors go into debt. how does she pay for student debt, much less rent, utilities, transportation, health insurance, and education? and her kids.

but WTF ever, i didn't ask b/c i didn't want her to say i was rude.

but my sister owns the house i have been living in, so i am afraid that she will sell the house and i will end up homeless.

i feel so vulnerable/fragile, s**t.