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Should men read Harlequin romances and watch Hallmark movies

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Honey69
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Yesterday, 2:23 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:
According to what I’ve read, Emmanuelle (1974) is a French adult film that got mediocre reviews and that has at least one scene that would be highly triggering to some women.

What “inkling” is the film supposed to give “the ladies” apart from the reminder that there are far worse fates than being alone?


The movie is based on a book that was written by a woman.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emmanuelle_(1974_film)

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In Asia, many women saw it as a liberating piece focusing on the power and strength of Emmanuelle and not her exploitation. Sylvia Kristel stated that "Japanese feminists were rather delighted with the film because they thought Emmanuelle was dominant, just because of this one scene where she climbs on top of her husband. That was the moment when all the Japanese women stood up and applauded."


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TwilightPrincess
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Yesterday, 2:31 pm

Honey69 wrote:
The movie is based on a book that was written by a woman.

That doesn’t change the fact that it would be highly triggering to a lot of women for obvious reasons although I will mention in passing that the screenplay was written by a man and the film was directed by a man.

Show Spoiler
Quote:
At dinner, Mario tells Emmanuelle that monogamy will soon die out and that she must learn to let lust, rather than guilt or reason, guide her when it comes to sex. This will lead her to greater levels of pleasure. To instill this lesson, Mario takes her to an opium den. There, she is raped by one of the denizens while Mario watches.

[…]

In France, feminist viewers complained that the character of Emmanuelle was "an object of male fantasies." In a review from 1974, Variety opined that Emmanuelle was "more a come-on for the civil service than for femme lib."

Wikipedia

Viewers in 2025 from disparate cultures and locations would likely have even more problems with it than they did in 1974.

What “inkling” is the film supposed to give “the ladies” apart from the reminder that there are far worse fates than being alone?


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BillyTree
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Yesterday, 3:07 pm

I think what works best for straight men trying to be popular with straight women is to follow their gut feeling, be themselves, relax and don't overthink it.


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BTDT
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Yesterday, 3:30 pm

https://www.straitstimes.com/lifestyle/ ... -singapore
Crazy Rich Asians is movie worth watching if you want to learn about Asian culture.
Of course, most Asians aren't rich. But a lot of stuff isn't far off from the truth.
They went the "extra mile" to do things accurately. The mahjong scene, for instance.
https://www.vox.com/first-person/2018/8 ... ie-mahjong



cyberdora
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Yesterday, 4:15 pm

Speaking to my daughter's friends who are around 19, the answer is clearly no. the cultural references from the old romantic movies are dated and the social media culture is all pervasive. If you don't have a social media digital footprint with a collage of your "great life" then you are effectively invisible to younger women. Second the romance/gentlemen schema from the 1950s is cringe, there are elements that still work (holding the door, waiting for a woman to sit down) but netflix/menulog > restaurant/movie and conversations are not the same (even the 90s are dated). Everything has changed.



Honey69
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Yesterday, 5:22 pm



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktDbcwEObSE


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TwilightPrincess
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Yesterday, 6:24 pm

For some reason, that video makes me want to burp the alphabet, but I don’t know how. New goal!


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MatchboxVagabond
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Yesterday, 11:38 pm

Lost_dragon wrote:
I got a bit distracted there anyway. As for Hallmark movies, I think the idea is that they're so bad that they're good? Sometimes. I have given up halfway through on a couple of them. I don't think there's much to be learned from a Hallmark movie.

There are good romance films out there but Hallmark type movies...not so much.

I'm more of an - action adventure film that has a romance subplot - fan myself.

The idea is that they're just comforting. The common denominator between the two is that they're stupid entertainment that you're not really supposed to think too much about. You're certainly not supposed to be learning anything about how to interact with the other sexes from them. A bunch of it would warrant stalking complaints being forwarded to the local police department if it was happening in real life.



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Today, 7:28 am

MatchboxVagabond wrote:
Lost_dragon wrote:
I got a bit distracted there anyway. As for Hallmark movies, I think the idea is that they're so bad that they're good? Sometimes. I have given up halfway through on a couple of them. I don't think there's much to be learned from a Hallmark movie.

There are good romance films out there but Hallmark type movies...not so much.

I'm more of an - action adventure film that has a romance subplot - fan myself.

The idea is that they're just comforting. The common denominator between the two is that they're stupid entertainment that you're not really supposed to think too much about. You're certainly not supposed to be learning anything about how to interact with the other sexes from them. A bunch of it would warrant stalking complaints being forwarded to the local police department if it was happening in real life.
That's true. There's also a trend of manipulation, exploitation, pretending/faking, & plain lying. That sounds like a horrible foundation to build a relationship on.


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Honey69
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Today, 8:33 am

A lot of women my age did grow up on the Disney princess fantasy of marrying a handsome prince.

And, a lot of them ended up disappointed.


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TwilightPrincess
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Today, 8:49 am

Guys in some romance novels display obsessive behavior as though their sole interest in life is the woman they’re pursuing and madly in love with. Having other interests and hobbies is always good. :lol:

In addition to what others have said about stalking and other toxic behaviors which I totally agree with, I think there’s also sometimes overprotectiveness going on in the romance genre which can look like or cross over into being controlling in real life. Characters in romance novels or Disney movies for that matter don’t have ulterior motives unless they are a villain character who’s also pretty transparent. It’s simple. Real life isn’t like that, and I don’t think most people expect it to be.


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