Friends that don't know you well enough

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gentleman

you brought up a good point. there is no such thing as "correct" expectations. maybe i was expecting too much of him. expectations are not inherently good or bad, but maybe my expectations are excessive.

it is also a good point, that corey was a better "friend" to me, than i was to him. even though his advice was ineffective, he did waste time and energy giving me the advice. once in a while he answered my email. there is no law that said that he has to, and i did not pay him to do it. so what the flying f**k ever, s**t.

for a longfuck time, i applied to a lot of jobs. a couple job interviews. zero offers. my work history unstable. got made redundant from plenty of jobs, on the third day. zero job skills. autism. long amounts of unemployment. besides, plenty of jobs much worse than my current one. and what i don't like about my "job": micromanagement. but other jobs might be even worse than mine, and i won't know until after i start working there.

i used to often see cory at trader joe's.

now i have been going to trader joe's less often.

the most recent time i saw cory: october 2023.

2023, saw him 2x: october and march. rode in his car one time, for four miles only.

most recent email from cory, july 2023. it is now january 2025. i haven't contacted him since then.

some articles say that it is only possible to have 150 friends because it is not possible to keep up with so many different lives. every time i bothered cory about emailing me more often he kept saying he was busy. at that time, i thought "busy" was too vague and an excuse and what the flying f**k ever. however, there is no law that says that he has to email me and i am not paying him minimum wage to email me and he does not get community service credit for emailing me. there is no extortion involved either, so it is his choice whether or not to email me. (kind of like larry).

in a way, the way cory interacts with me is like the way that i interact with Annoying Alberto at work. so what the flying f**k ever s**t.

cory kept peer pressuring me to do thing i don't wanna do. they are not "bad", illegal, immoral or anything like that, just ineffective. for example, he said that i should take community college classes so that i could qualify to apply for internships that require interns to be students. in a way, it makes sense, but since i had a BA already, it was really inefficient. yes, i got a couple (unpaid) internships (that i otherwise would not have gotten), but none of them lead to a paying job, much less career. which is not cory's fault and nothing he could've known a priori.

on the other hand, cory said he is "sure" none of the other lot attendants have college degrees. there is no way for him to know that. there are plenty of reasons why someone might be working @ home depot. esp since 2008 recession and 2020 coronavirus. home depot is a side hustle for some ass holes.

some annoying lil dipshits said they have degrees:

jim (animation), former head cashier
nicole (business), former CXM
dijon (drama) former cashier
emma, former cashier
melissa, former (?)
cortez, former Pro Cashier/customer service, masters, psych
meylin, head cashier, biology
douglas, associates, sociology, former gardener
norman, three years mechanical engineering, CXM
daniel, milwaukee, politycal science and finance

also i hate how cory's so f*****g obsessed with my stupidass college degree. i got it in 2007. it is now 2025. i haven't forgotten i have one. unless i get alzheimers i wont forget i have a college degree, and if i get alzheimers, i have better things to worry about than my stupidass college degree. cory doesn't know or care about anything about be except that i have a college degree, even though i've told him a lot of s**t. he doesn't hear, care, understand, or believe or remember what i said. he didn't say "excuse me" instead of "huh" and "what". manipulative. peer pressure. besides, after he got laid off from software engineering, he worked @ trader joes and how he's a Ramp Agent. so what the flying f**k ever. he's a lot more overqualified for his jobs than i am for mine.

knowledge skills ability

but what the flying f**k ever s**t

at least i don't have to interact with him awkwardly at aikido. i don't see him regularly. he only lives about one mile away from me.

today's cory's birthday. i didn't wish him a happy birthday.

it gets on my f*****g nerves how cory had the nerve to just expect that i take whatever advice he gave me, just b/c he was friendly and a software engineer at that time and had good intentions.

at his advice, i wasted a lot of time, money and energy taking community college classes, so that i could qualify for internships that require applicants to be students. got a couple unpaid internships. the unpaid internships did nothing for my stupidass career. still ended up @ home f*****g depot, s**t. his advice was so f*****g ineffective and inefficient. it gets on my nerves how i tried to decline his advice and that ass hole had the nerve to keep pushing it on me. (reminds me of peer pressure and "just say no to drugs", even though community college is not a drug).

plenty of precious lil "people" underemployed:
since 2008 recession and 2020 coronavirus
social science/humanities majors (not STEM)
not from ivy league school, no graduate degree
GPA too low for grad school or teaching credential
not cisgender
long periods of unemployment
autistic


there are plenty of reasons why someone would be underemployed, that do not apply to me
felony convictions
drugs
health
bad personalities

cory has a masters in math. he knows more about the stupidass job market than me. there are many things employers look for from candidates. education is just (sometimes) one of them. experience and personality are high on the list. personality is pretty subjective. hiring managers want what they think is a "great personality", but "smooth talking" annoying lil dipshits sometimes put up a great *facade* but underneath it they are just manipulative, rude, selfish, shallow, loud, stupid ass holes. such as my coworkers: angela d, angela w, star r, hardware associate RM, gardener LPK, janice C., and other idiots. former Night Manager Sadiq, DS doan, DS hai, do not speak english, but it's home depot can choose to hire any reptile it wants.

some ass holes having sex with the boss.

when two reptiles have sex, i do not have the legal right, moral right or physical strength to stop them. except in some situations i might be able to squirt them with a garden hose, s**t! (rolls eyes).

cory has no "skin" in the game. that ass hole had the nerve to gimmie bad advice after bad advice and he had nothing to lose.

meanwhile, after getting laid off from software engineering, cory worked @ trader joe's as a mate, and then as a Ramp Agent. ramp agents have to lift 80 pound luggage. cory's the one underemployed. all my jobs have been minimum wage and none of them have required a high school diploma, much less a college degree.

besides home depot hires convicted felons. home depot hires any old snake. they do background checks, but whatever. low standards.

cory often didn't answer my email. when he did, he often didn't address what i wrote. or he went out of his way to make wrong assumptions. some assumptions are natural, normal, necessary, or subconscious, but i don't think his assumptions were any of them.

my major, cognitive science, does not have many jobs related to it, esp since i didn't do a specialization and i do not have programming skills (although i took C++ and html and javascript and matlab and other forms of BS). yes, some students got jobs in cogntive science with only a bachelors, but they had better personalities than me, specializations, internships, higher GPAS, and other stupid forms of BS.

also about cory's compliments. positive judgments are just as judgmental as negative judgments.

dispositional vs situational

nobody's perfect and there is nothing that great about me. the fact that he acts like he doesn't know that, makes me wonder how well he knows me. either he's in denial or he's being sarcastic or some other worse option that i haven't thought of thus far.

in any event, it gets so f*****g frustrating and annoying to have to explain every lil thing to that stupid ass b***h. besides he often doesn't hear, care, understand, believe or remember what i said.

interacting with that ass hole is not worth the energy it takes to do it, positively. and quite frankly i think he doesn't have enough to offer me positively, to make it worth the energy

sometimes i am so tired i do not want to do anything all day long. today the only people i talked to were the bus driver and the casher. and that's just b/c the register locked up. i would much rather not have to interact with anyone, s**t.

cory said he was "sure none of the other lot attendants have college degrees"

cory hasn't even seen the other lot attendants, much less seen their transcripts

cory seems to have an unhealthy obsession with college degrees.

it doesn't make sense

plenty of people with bachelors degrees work in jobs that do not require bachelors degrees. (about 50 percent according to some articles. esp outside STEM)

(rolls eyes)

skills knowledge abilities

the company can hire anyone it wants

after hiring, the company can fire anyone for any reason. ("at will" employer)



current and former servants that had degrees or close:

head cashier jim, animation
some girl that said she was marrying (former) gardener Sam
(former) pro desk and customer service cortez, masters, psych
head cashier MM
former cashier emma

lenin, painter
daniel (milwaukee), finance and political science
andrew, hardware, psych
dijon, former cashier, drama
isahi, computer science, lot attendant